[ihatewestseneca]

I also keep thinking how she could do this to us..

Well... that is the million dollar question... "how could they just... (you fill in the blank)?"

[nickshehe]

I felt a lot better after deciding NC but now its seemingly worse knowing that its over and that is that.
Im still young and have no intention of getting married any time soon.. We've only been apart less than a month and I've slept with 2 girls.. but I still miss her and I'm still hurt.

[nickshehe]

She just talked to me again on msn asking if I'm there..
Didn't reply :/
I kind of wait for her all day to come and approach me at some point.. shes been doing so every 2-3 days so far.. blah

[nickshehe]

She asked me if I'm ignoring her on purpose..
Again I didn't reply..
If I said yes she'd either ask why and we would talk about it and id get pissed off again knowing she doesn't care about me..
Or she would say "ok" and id be equally pissed off..

This sucks

[Guest555]

7 weeks I gone without contact its hurting like crazy today, the other day I was strong and wrote it on here now I'm angy and hurt again whhy..

I know in 3 weeks time ill be expecting a call as its my birthday then it won't happen I was meant to goon holiday with him then and it won't happen, I want to fast forward to August then ill know I be happy.

But I am proud of myself as soon as he said its over I didn't chase I just disappeared and had no contact. Just need time to heal x

[nickshehe]

I need someone to tell me I'm doing the right thing not talking to her..
I don't need to tell her I'm no ttaling to her right?
That's a form of letting her have a go at having the control

[Guest555]

Ignore her. Your doing the right thing!! Be in control, don't let her think your there x

[nickshehe]

I know what you mean concerning future plans..
I booked flights to leave early from home to go back to the UK and stay with her for a week.. My residence contract excludes holidays and I can't go back to my halls until the 15th..
I was homeless up until about 4-5 days ago, now I'm going to stay at a friends in london..
But I keep thinking how we arranged my going there and how we were both sad about being apart for a month during the easter break and how I would miss her, and couldn't wait for the easter break to end.. and she dumped me before I left and now she couldn't care less.

A w e s o m e. :/

[Guest555]

I Guess we just got to stop thinking about the plans made, they have made their decision we got to deal with it. But please do not contact her, it will push her away, that's y I haven't contacted my ex but then he could have contacted me,

Mine finished with me very out the blue because he needed space. When he said this he was crying. I know there is no one else involved I think he is just mixed up very mixed up, 2yrs I spent with him planning our future now I got that on my own.

If they come back or not, doing no contact will help in the long run x

[ihatewestseneca]

I hate to burst your bubble, but you can never rule out the possibility of someone else. That may be the reason they're confused. As for NC, keep going! Any contact will only make you feel worse than you do now. But with NC it'll get better. I promise. I still have nights where I just want to talk to my ex, but I find if I get up for a drink, when I sit back down, that feeling is almost gone... another strange "bi-polar" feeling.

Keep it up people, NC is the right thing to do!

[nickshehe]

Im starting to feel that as well.. she put up pictures of her with this guy who I actually know.. and I was suspicious of a long time ago... makes me so angry but I can't do anything about it I can't let her know its getting to me.

[Nicole0425]

I haven't heard of or seen anything of a new girl. But I guess you never know. But, Nick, I think we should keep our heads held high and try our best to look forward. We will never let them know how much it's hurting us that they may have moved on.

And besides, who knows? Maybe this new person won't be so great... and maybe it'll make her regret her dumb decision. But.. her loss, you know? I don't mean it will make her regret it so that she'll come back, but regret it in the sense that.. she's just dumb. I don't know if that makes sense. I hope my ex regrets what he did just so I can have the satisfaction of knowing he's an idiot.

Anyway.. I'm sending everyone on this crazy thread a hug, in whatever stage. A hug for those who hurt, a hug for those who support, and a hug for everyone in between. You all have been such a blessing and help to me.

[len21]

Hi all... well major step back for me, I ended up going to the ex's with my group of friends on sat night for house warming. As soon as I got there he would not stop staring at me and text me saying thanks so much for coming you look great. The one thing I know is that he is so attracted to me and as bad as that sounds I almost like knowing that I have that power.. anyway as the night went on and I got a bit drunk somehow I ended up staying and he started saying how much he had missed not talking to him after the past three weeks and how he wanted us to have a proper chat when we were sober, funny now the N/C suddenly gave me that power again. Soooo we slept together... stupid I know and then spent all Sunday just hanging out like old times it was so fun but at the same time I didn't let myself get too carried away I know it doesn't mean anything and we are NOT getting back together. He text me last night and said how great it was to see me again and stuff. Now I am confussed I don't want to get back together after how far I have come but it was so good to spend time with him...

[ihatewestseneca]

Im starting to feel that aswell..she put up pictures of her with this guy who I actually know..and I was suspicious of a long time ago...makes me so angry but I can't do anything about it I can't let her know its getting to me.

Stay away from myspace and Facebook... only pain can come from those sites... its hard, but don't look! You'll feel so much better if you beat those urges.

[Nicole0425]

Day 4.

I also suck at not looking at his Facebook. I know I shouldn't. But I miss him terribly and I don't know.. it's hard. I can't wait to stop crying every day.

How long does this "crap phase" take for an almost four-year (first love) relationship?

:-(

[ISneezeFunny]

Basic rule of thumb says... a month for every year you've been together, but that obviously differs based on person to person... I've known people that have gotten over their 3 year relationships in 2 weeks, and have also known people that have passed 8 months and aren't still over their 1 year relationship... really up to them.

You can delay this "healing" process by contacting him, checking fbook (it is... the devil. Trust me), and thinking about him day/night...

You can speed the process up by keeping busy and spending time with your friends to forget about him. Your choice.

Good luck.

[spartan24018]

It's been seven months now, I feel great
One question though (this is just a really short one, I didn't think creating a post would be necessary)
Once in a while, when I see her, I get a bit weird feeling. I don't like her but it's just a tiny bit of an attraction. I'm just wondering if this is normal or not :confused:

Thanks

[ISneezeFunny]

Yeah, I think it is... I mean, she was once an important part of your life, so it's normal to feel "something"... if I can figure out what that "something" is, I'll let you know.

As for me, I'm on 4 months now, and I'm doing fine... although I still have nostalgic flashbacks... they last only a few seconds. I still find myself avoiding her or trying to not go places where I know she will be with her new boyfriend... but since we don't have the same friends, it's not too tragic.

[George_1950]

Sounds normal to me, but don't judge a book by its movie.

[spartan24018]

Thanks guys
I have flashbacks too, with the notes that I haven't gotten rid of yet but everything's cool. There's nothing left for her here anymore.
Anyway, I wish you guys well. Peace out