[Tom-Tom]

The term nice guys finish last would fit me perfectly.. Every time I try getting close to someone, rather it be a friend or a girlfriend, it always seems to end in heartbreak or some kind of betrayal. I've become really down about everything, quit my job and now living on what few dollars I have saved. Only being 19 I realize this isn't the time for me to feel this way. I've seem to lose all hope and every little thing angers me. I've been through my fair share of doctors and anti-depressants to try and fix the problem, nothing has helped. Any ideas? :confused:

[Wildcat21]

Hey Tom,

You're a young guy - lots more to live for. I'd work on imnproving myself.

Keys are to get rid of this 'Nice Guy' syndrome while your young. It's bad for business. I am not saying be mean, a crook or what ever.

I highly advise going to www.askmen.com - read about dating, all the other articles - great articles there.

Friendship takes time. Lots of time. Many, many days. It's hard work.

I'd start working - with weights, and running. It helps the mind and body.

This site may be too much for - but, if you want to learn about Nice Guys - go to www.relationships.blog-city.com

[Carmela]

From a female perspective, don't change because women do like nice guys, or at least QUALITY women like nice guys. Women who date jerks are insecure and rejection is like an aphrodisiac for them, but you don't want to be with these women anyway. Continue to be the great guy that you are. When I say nice guy, I mean nice guy, and not a pushover as there is such a thing as being TOO nice to the point where women take advantage of you to talk about their guy problems, etc. Good luck, and I hope find the right woman/girl for you, just don't change. The woman that will like you for you will be the one you want to be with.

[keenu]

You have told me what your problem is.
You believe that you are a nice guy who finishes last.
You must change that belief about yourself. You must learn to believe that you can finish first even if you are a nice guy.
This is really all you need to do because you are what you believe.

[Wildcat21]

Yes - I agree - there are two different types of nice guys.

1. The pushovers, who get walked all over and used by woman. They are always agreeable - never say no. The ydo not have a spine, the ydo not say what they really want. They will NOT upset a woman at all cost. These guys make woman their entire lives - YUCK!

YOU DON'T EVER WANT TO BE THIS GUY - it's terrible.

2. Then there are the truly 'nice guys' - which I would rather call the 'good guys' - these guys have a life, they WILL say no, they do not put up with woman's crap and their tests, BUT they treat woman very well - fun to be with. These guys have busy active lives - the woman have to try their hardest just to fit in. These guys know woman are part of their lives - not their entire lives. These guys work hard at work, school, family, friends, hobbies, social activities, workout, etc.