[pastmind]

I am 20 years old and a full time college student. In the past year and a half I have conquered being a college freshman, losing friends, gaining friends and have gained new experiences and knowledge and have been learning to live on my own. I was never the girl that was in need of a boyfriend or ever wanted one. I was always an independent person. However, one night I was standing in an elevator waiting for the damn door to slide shut so I could hurry and get to the first floor to smoke a desperately needed cigarette. Then suddenly I hear a guy screaming for me to hold the elevator door open just a second longer... and there he was, a tall dark and handsome man standing inches away from me. From that second on, it seemed as if we could not take our eyes off each other, and in the past year and half I have had the time of my life getting to know a really great man that has become my best friend.

Now, he's the problem: I love this man with all of my heart, but he is in the military. The Navy. Luckily, he's been stationed closer to home and the drive is now only five hours long from my town house just off campus. We spend every second that we can together when he's on leave or has open weekends, but it has gotten to the point where we honestly cannot stand being apart. He asked me to marry him so that we can be together.

I said yes, but lets not rush it. There is a lot to figure out. I refuse to marry before I am 21, which is funny, because I always said I'd never marry until I was done with school, but now we have this crazy plan that I can transfer to other schools, live with him, be with him, let him and the navy pay for health car and living expenses, etc. It all sounds so simple, but the fact of the matter is, I have at least three years left of school to become a teacher, and my parents will no longer help me out with the bills if I suddenly change course on them and get married (and we all know student loans are rough to pay back).

We are waiting this out for as long as we possibly can; trying hard to deal with the challenges of being separated and getting through our own personal challenges alone--away from one another.

Anyway, I guess the question here is: What advice can I get on this situation? If in time I still find myself crying because I want him near me so badly... Should I marry him in a year? Is 21 still too young even if I am acutely aware of all of the challenges and difficulties that come hand in hand with marriage?

[Fr_Chuck]

If you are truly in love, you will not be able to stay apart. Does he get deployed on a ship ?

Many couples marry and one of the partners complete school.

I do perfer couples to be older, but it is hard to tell each couple is different

[pastmind]

He is an aviator electrician. He should get deployed, but wherever he goes he stays on the land, or on base. Unfortunately, he has only been in the navy for about 8 months, and has only just arrived in his newest location, so we are not aware of exactly what his orders and duties will be quite yet for the next four years.

[jrb252000]

I would have to say try and finish school first. If you transfer schools and all your credits don't transfer you will have to retake classes, not to mention what happens if he has to move again before you are done. I know I was military and still married to a soldier.

If you all get married:
The advantage is you would be allowed to use is GIBIll and he can use TA while he is in.

Good luck to you.

[MrsHec4]

Follow your heart sweetie. Things will work themselves out. Marrying into the military is a hard transition but if you really love him I say take a chance and go for it.