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inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 06:54 AM

:confused: I went to a bachelor party "weekend" in Myrtle beach with 10 guys. It ended up Saturday night in a strip club. I did not tell my wife but when she asked id did tell her. Now she has gone of the deep end. What can I do?

jrb252000 · Aug 1, 2007, 07:09 AM

You should point out that you were at least honest with her and that you have nothing to hide. I would give her time to calm down and it should pass.

NeedKarma · Aug 1, 2007, 07:11 AM

Did she know that you were at a bachelor party to begin with?

GlindaofOz · Aug 1, 2007, 07:12 AM

Over a strip club? Women still get mad about this? Did you sleep with a stripper or something?

Michelle0410 · Aug 1, 2007, 07:13 AM

Do you have trust issues? I know strip clubs can cause a lot of insecurities, myself I have never cared simply because a. if someone is going to cheat they are going to cheat and b. I am a very self confident girl. Maybe your wife just thought it was not appropriate considering you are married, or maybe thoughts of what you could have done crossed through her mind, or simply the fact of you looking at other women hurt her. Now all you can do is try to make things better and make sure that she knows that she is the ONLY woman in your life. In the next couple of days (or weeks depending on just how mad she is) just make her feel special and let her know that she has nothing to worry about, don't make it worse on yourslef. Let her know that you where honestl with her because you going meant nothing, your sorry that she's upset but if that's how she really feels your sorry and won't go again. Hope that helps a little bit a least. =)

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 07:14 AM

Yes she knew I was going and she knew it was for the whole weekend. We left Friday played gold Saturday and then Saturday evening got in a limo and went out.

Michelle0410 · Aug 1, 2007, 07:15 AM

Originally Posted by inthedogbox

Yes she knew i was going and she knew it was for the whole weekend. We left Friday played gold Saturday and then Saturday evening got in a limo and went out.

Then she probably should have had a good idea that 95% of bachelor parties consist of strip clubs! =0)

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 07:21 AM

All your answers are a great help. She does have trust issues with me and we have been married for 17 years now. I did not even go to the stage where the women where dancing and spent $1. I only paid for me covercharge. The bacholar threw up when a stripper was in front of him though. I must admit that was funny and I had to take him to the limmo.

GoldieMae · Aug 1, 2007, 07:28 AM

Tell her that she has nothing to worry about, that she's the only one you want, and that the last place a man can pick up a woman is in a strip club (you can't touch them, buy them a drink, etc. without Bluto wanting to rip your arms off). Tell her that you really didn't want to go, but everyone else did, and the only other options were for you to either hit a bar alone, which would make you look like you were looking, or sit alone in the hotel room and ruin the weekend for the guy getting married. You don't want to come back with fewer friends.

I would much rather have my husband go to a strip club with a bunch of dorky guys on a bachelor party than go to a regular bar, where the chances of hooking up with a random drunk co-ed goes from non-existent to guaranteed if you want it. Think about it. At the strip club, the bachelor party group sticks out like a blinking wallet full of singles. The strippers, waitresses, and the body guards see them as a cash cow. At a bar, a bachelor party group sticks out as a bunch of guys looking to hook up. To a drunk, single 20-something female, a guy attending a bachelor party is a no strings attached easy hook up.

When I got divorces a few years back, I started hanging out with some younger single women who went to bars to hook up. (yuck, but that's beside the point). If any single one of these women wanted to hook up with a guy she met in a bar, she would target some drunk friend of the groom. And sometimes the groom.

So if you really want the truth of it, the strip club is the much less harmful place to go on a bachelor party.

Oh, and buy her something nice. NOT flowers. Something simple and meaningful. Maybe her favorite take-out meal, or drive her clear across town to get her a snow cone, or a Gucci handbag always works (just kidding).

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 07:42 AM

Ok, I will take all you advice and let you know how it turns out. I have already spent the night on the coach last night and feel another one coming along.

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 07:45 AM

Funny thing is. I knew I was going to be in S$#T when I went in.

Michelle0410 · Aug 1, 2007, 07:46 AM

Originally Posted by inthedogbox

Funny thing is. I knew i was going to be in S$#T when i whent in.

well there you go, next time don't go, or get a more comfy couch =0)

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 07:47 AM

:) you funny.

Michelle0410 · Aug 1, 2007, 07:51 AM

Originally Posted by inthedogbox

:) you funny.

HAHA, I THOUGHT YOU WOULD LIKE THAT

Canada_Sweety · Aug 1, 2007, 11:20 AM

You should ask her why shes so mad. Almost all bachelor parties consist of a stripper or a strip club or something involving women shaking their ta-tas. She knows this, so why is she so upset?

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 11:42 AM

I think it might be the fact that we are from South Africa and I know some South African women are still set in there old moral ways. Yes I know it was wrong for me to go, and believe me it does not get me off at all, but I was not going to be a stick in the mud... Maybe the wrong choice of words :) hehehe. A party pooper.

GoldieMae · Aug 1, 2007, 12:18 PM

If you didn't go you would have totally been a party pooper. But many women don't get it. I don't approve of making strip clubs a regular habit, but you seem like a stand up man who is true to his wife. If the rationale doesn't work, the only thing that will is groveling.

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 12:26 PM

I guess it will have to be the latter part of that statement. Another odd thing is that my brother in-law was with me "my wife's sisters husband" she knew that it might end up in a strip club where 90% of bachelors parties end up and she was fine with it. She does not agree with it like most women won't and I respect not all women are the same. Thanks for your insight though. ;)

nicespringgirl · Aug 1, 2007, 12:26 PM

What is a bachelor party? Who are eligible to attend?

inthedogbox · Aug 1, 2007, 12:27 PM

Originally Posted by GoldieMae

If you didn't go you would have totally been a party pooper. But many women don't get it. I don't approve of making strip clubs a regular habit, but you seem like a stand up man who is true to his wife. If the rationale doesn't work, the only thing that will is groveling.

Thanks for the compliment!