[Radium]

That's really all I am trying to see here, is WHAT LOVE IS? Or what you as a person believes love is? I just want to see peoples own takes on what love is to them.

I personally feel that Love doesn't just happen, you have to work at it. Sure there is a slight attraction but it just does not last. It only hangs around for a short time, and it is what we do after that spark has gone to make sure we love still. IT takes two people committing !00% to 100% on both sides for love to last. It is the act of giving to someone and in return receiving there giving. I don't believe that you just POOF fall in love and it stays. It takes work like most anything for it to last. You have to be willing to give of yourself to receive something back.

I could go on about it, but that is my basic view. It just made me curious when I was reading about the divorce rate on the rise. So please if you like feel free to share what you think love is. Even if you totally disagree with me. I am curious to hear all points of view.

Oh and to add, How many people think it is possible to be friends with an ex, and how many don't. And if you want what's your Take on it if you answer this one?

[mckenzie134]

Love is missing someone when they are not around. Not averygood wayto look at it but itstrue and I dontrally care whatpeople say because most aydisagrehere. And say something likewell its loving and knowing or some crap. That's rubbish there isn't really much love and that's whypeople say theyfall in andout of love so quicly. When youstart a relationship there isattraction but then love can happen and this is normally caused by one person miising the other andwantingtosee them all the time and then they tart to get a feeling of needing to see that person and then everything they do they must tell that person and when something happens in there lofe they want to share it with that person and ifthey are busy doing there own things then love will build tension will build and people will feel like its love when its actually that they do not want to be without that person and they always want them around and ant to share things with that person.

Well suppose you coud call that love but I think its just a made up word for a set of feelings which are created when someone you want to spend time with is ot always there and that's when you realise you really want tobe with them.

No one else will do. But when you get marriedand then these feelings can sometims fade over time because people spendtomuch time togetherand love falls out. See they are notmissing eachotherlikethey used too and so on. That's all it is mate!!
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On the other question no exscant be friends and ifthey can they were never really into eachothetr. Im talking exs who had a decent relationship. Of course you can't be friends becauseif you truly ad feelings forsomeone how can you handle them being with someone else a. also why would you want to be friends with an ex becausethey when in the relationship aremeant to be yourbest friend and especially ifyou say had a 3 year plus relationship and then they leave you well what kindoffriend woulddo thattoyou. Forallthose people who say you can be friends later orso on well NO why the Hell wouldyou want someone in your life who treated you like CAP afterallthat time. The only reason sometimespeople become friends ibecausethe poersomn who got dumped findssomeone better and then feels like they can be friends cause they are happier with the new person. Butrthen again why wouldyou what to talk to them after they Dumpedyou they pretty much stabbed you in the back and left!! WHO CARESABOUT SOMEONE LIKETHA!!

[s_cianci]

I think you've hit it right on the head. As for being friends with an ex, I don't think it's usually possible. There's just too much anger and hurt feelings.

[PamelaAnn077]

True love is loving for love's sake and not expecting anything in return! Is that hard? Most definitely, but that's love's true definition as far as I'm concerned. Coming from a place of love, rather than expecting another to do the loving for us. To reach out even when the situation is hard... to keep loving despite obstacles and problems. In my counseling practice I have often heard folks talking about all they do to love their spouse, their girlfriend, boyfriend, etc. and how they then look for something loving in return. Often times that reciprocal love happens... very often it doesn't (at least not in the way you might expect it!) If you can detach from the EXPECTATION of getting something back, you can relax and love from a purer motive. Expectations usually then lead to "scorekeeping" where one partner keeps track of the good things he/she does or says, and keeps track of (and scores) their partner's good deeds and loving gestures, gifts, kind words, etc. to see if they measure up. This is a lose/lose situation and hurts both people.

I like what the Bible says... "love is gentle and kind and seeks not its own"... that about says it all. It also says that of all the gifts, love is the greatest of all... "love suffers long and does not envy; it is not puffed up. It does not behave rudely, is not provoked and thinks no evil. Love bears all things, believes all things and endures all things. Love never fails".

In other words... love (as you said) is work. And it is the most selfless "work" you will ever do! Love with another human being is at times passionate, full of wonder and beauty, and at other times, darn tiresome and frustrating! Love is learning to hang in there even when times are tough and it would be easier to just give up.

Anyway, I could go on and on, but that's my take on your interesting post.

[Jiser]

Mcenzie you mentioned what friend would stab you in the back, bare in mind that our ex relationships were a relationship (romantic) and not nessarily a friendship. Although we could have called our ex's our best friends, they were romantic friends never the less which I think crosses the border.

In a fantasy world I would love that my ex and me could be friends but in reality that's not going to happen. (I think a few others would like to think that to?) Same in a lot of cases. Good for those who can and I think its probably those who were friends before the relationship or because of a massive amount of time has passed. This is why it is so important to go NC!

Ive seen relationships of 60 years. What is love? Who knows but hey I can't wait to meet it.

[nicespringgirl]

Love should be lofty! Morals, Justice go with it!

[Canada_Sweety]

Love... Love is love. Not much to explain but yet there is so much to say. Love is when you can feel someone coursing through your veins. Love is when you know you have found love. Love is when someone breaks your heart in every possible way and you can still admit you love them. Love is a 4 letter word with 4 million meanings. Love can turn something ordinary like teenage love and turn it into something extraordinary like that couple having a 75th wedding anniversary and being happy as they were all 75 years go. Love is something that can be right in front of you though it might take a few times to see it. Love is that sensation you get when your team scores a goal, or when your child takes it's first step, or when you see your sister that you haven't seen in years. Love can be a force stronger then man made machines, or stronger then the will to separate. Love of course can be mistaken for lust and people do it all the time, but the difference between the two is that you can truly feel love... not in your pants and not in your head but in your heart 7 soul. Love can take over your senses and remind you of said person that you love. And who is to say that love is just for people? What I mean is that love can also be felt for a sports team or for a novel or for something you hold near & dear to you. Love is so many things but I guess in one word I would have to say that love is wonderful.
As for your question about being friends with your ex's, yes, it's normal to me. I try to remain friends with my ex's. My take on it is that I don't see anything wrong with it... but of course my relationships all ended on pretty good terms, in due time that is.

[nicespringgirl]

Love needs good reasons, no blind love.
If we judge people we don't know how to love them.
No matter how strong the love, remember "believe in God,but tie your horse!"
Live in peace

[ellen-07]

I Fink Love Is Feeling The Need to be With That Person, Always Missing And Finking Of Them. When You Fallout With Them You Can Feel It Hurting Or When You've Had A Good Tym With That Person You Feel Happy.

[kaitlinandreg07]

Love is missing someone when you are both apart from one another. People say that if you love soemone you would go to the end of the earth and stay there... but I couldn't. Love is when you give some one a hug or kiss out of the blue... when you finish each others sentences... when you would give up everything to be with them... in any whether you would run to them... you stick up for them... hold them when they are sad... being there through thick and thin... waiting for them for how evr long it takes... appreciating them...
If I have missed anything well I include it now...
Love is life...

[mckenzie134]

The reason love does not die between a parent and a child as someone mentioned is that that is a different knind of love, it is not a romantic love it is not a sexuall love it is not fuelled by needing to be with that person and missing them when they are not around. It is a totally different love. The love you feel is through your mind. When you love a brother or sister you love them in your mind and not as much in your feelings. In a relationship you love someone cause you miss them you do not love your mum or dad cause you miss them you love them because they care for you and you care for them there is a bond that is why family love stays strong because when you are upset you know who will always be there for you your family. This is also because normally there is no jealousy you love to see them succeed and enjoy seeing them happy. Yet in a relationship you feel love fropm the heart and it runs through your body and gets deeper as you miss that person. You want to be around them all the time...

[mckenzie134]

The reason love does not die between a parent and a child as someone mentioned is that that is a different knind of love, it is not a romantic love it is not a sexuall love it is not fuelled by needing to be with that person and missing them when they are not around. It is a totally different love. The love you feel is through your mind. When you love a brother or sister you love them in your mind and not as much in your feelings. In a relationship you love someone cause you miss them you do not love your mum or dad cause you miss them you love them because they care for you and you care for them there is a bond that is why family love stays strong because when you are upset you know who will always be there for you your family. This is also because normally there is no jealousy you love to see them succeed and enjoy seeing them happy. Yet in a relationship you feel love fropm the heart and it runs through your body and gets deeper as you miss that person. You want to be around them all the time...

[Radium]

Ok I see where all you are coming from, But The question asked is what does love mean to you? Ys some of you have answered but at the same time some of you have just given responses to other peoples Thoughts on Love. I don't want this to be a debate. I want it to be a question that each can answer from the depths of their heart. Nothing to do with any ridcule or confrontation from anyone else. I want everyone's take on it. That's All. No fear of what someone else will say noe fear of debate just their perspective that's all.

[warrior21]

I agree that love is something very special. It is a special feeling you feel for that person you care about, that person that you miss when is not around. True love is eternal; you can't just love someone and then stop loving that person. If you don't love someone anymore, you never did love that person in the first place. There are different kinds of love. The love you feel for a friend, for a family and for that special person in your life.

I wouldn't be body, body friends with my ex. I have to talk to you him, and I do the minimum, only when is related to our children. Other than that, I am not friends with him, just have to deal with him, because I have no choice and because of the 20 years of life that we lived together and mostly because we have two kids. If it wasn’t for the children, I wouldn’t talk to him ever.