[jazzbabie]

So this is the question that's been killing me the most... my and my boyfriend have been tog for a while now... I was pregnant but recently found out that I had a miscarriage.. very heart breaking to me but yet I can not feel that same emotion from him.. he already wanted the pregency terminated, and he's getting married not now but soon when his mother finds him the perfect girl, I realized I don't want this realionship yet I feel helpess towards him... I think he and I care a lot for each other but sometimes he feels that the age factor does matter.. not to him but his family but when in love its only you and the other person not family or friends.. which are just a part of it... I know if I keep this realionship it won't go anywhere he won't marry me , he'll just use me until he does and it will kill me more and more if I stay with him.. it will just make me more attached towards him but I'm helpless I need him and he is there.. im just going threw a lot and he's the only comfort I have for now.. soo I really need help... how do I leave him and I love him so much.. hes someone I want to keep in a part of my life forever... and tats why I don't wnna leave I mean to have something so wonderful in your life even its for a while is better then not even a moment right? But I know in the end it will hurt a lot more when he leaves but then if I do leave I ll always end up thinking what if... what if him and I got married to him... as you can see I'm just very confused... so I need help how do I break it off and should I break it off or no..
Please please write back

[whiskey101]

One thing you never want to do is break it off when either you or your mate are depressed or pressured wait a little while and see if the problem does not fix itself. If your one of those people that doesn't mind paying a little money and getting involved in some therapy sessions for the two of you then I would suggest you do so. If it really isn't working out and you feel you would be better off splitting up then casually bring up the subject at a place not so public, the worst thing is a scene right out in the middle of everything.

Hope this helps =]

[Pook_Myster]

I believe that it is unhealthy to stay in a relationship that you know is not going anywhere, and as for being used, it sounds like you are possibly using him too - as your emotional support? That is fine, but why not just be friends then... the longer it goes on physically, the harder it is to leave... is there nobody else you can turn to? What happens if his mother does find that perfect girl for him and he leaves - then you have nobody to turn to. Would it perhaps be wise to try to talk to someone else about all that is going on in your life instead of using him as your support in preparation for the day when he isn't there?

In a truly loving relationship, the prospect of a beautiful baby is an exciting and rewarding experience- a baby is a symbol of the love two people share... perhaps the miscarriage was a little sign from god that you are not on your path of destiny with this man?

Sorry if I sounds full of doom & gloom...