[staremonkey]

Okay I have the husband who has cheated for past 7 years. He insists that she not only was NOTHING to him but that he broke it off with her. I just found a journal that he was keeping that shows that he obsessively kept track of when he called her when she called him, his suspicion of HER and his observations about phone sex, where they went on dates, names of restaurants, hotels, etc... Question, I plan to reveal to him this new info and give him the chance to tell the truth or I call the other woman. Do you think this is wise? If he used her for 7 goddam years what would stop him from doing the same to me.

[tpreyer]

Wake up he has used you and her for seven years. To see someone for that long means he has lot's of feeling's for her. You figure it out it's in your face what more do you need to know, what more could he tell you.

[GlindaofOz]

Wow. What a find. It sounds like your husband has some obsessive tendencies.

Also, based on what I've seen in my life (I've had friends who have dated married men) he painted you as a cold woman who refuses him who he doesn't love but stays with due to some sense of duty or fear of losing money or some other such nonsense. I can guarantee that he told her that he was leaving you for her. I can guarantee that he said he loved her. I would also guess that he was even engaged to her especially after 7 years.

Darling, your husband is a louse. Anyone who would disrespect your marriage for 7 years is not worth your time or love.

[CaptainRich]

7 years of using YOU!
How can you trust him again?

[Sincere1]

Your husband has cheated on you for the past 7 years, from the journal you found, you also know that he cared for her. Now you're worried if it's 'wise' to confront your husband or threaten to call the mistress?? I'm sorry, but you already must know that your marriage is a lie and this man is not a good candidate to EVER trust again.

At this point, do whatever it is that you want to do to give you some closure. If you want more details, or revenge... call the other woman. You're more likely to get the truth out of her than from your husband. Then MOVE ON. I wouldn't usually recommend that but I don't think you have anything left to salvage with this man. Your best revenge is to live a happy life and hopefully find a man that will love you like you deserve to be loved.

[inamkhan]

I think you should have to punish him and if he was cheating you for 7 years I think leave him because he was not getting enough from you so leave him is a good opinion

[tanndog]

My point is this, get a lawyer and take the journal to him. Don't tell your husband about it until you are able to move out or keep him out of the house because it is likely to turn violent. When people get caught it will, he will want the journal back because that is pretty incriminating. Divorce him! Take what you want if nothing else a chance to start again and find someone deserving of you.

[cerisa]

Stare monkey, Not only is he a cheater of rare talent, he is a stalker. Run to a reputable (?? )lawyer and take the info with you- have him make a copy, YOU keep the original in a safe place. And consider the time you wasted with him done. There are decent men in this world, You deserve better.

[Inspired]

I thought you guys got a divorce? Are you still with him?