[yankykate]

My husband and I have been married for over 10 years - he is a workaholic and I have known this from the very beginning but I loved him and thought it would be OK. This is my 3rd marriage and his 2d - I am retired and he is still very much working. I just do not know what to do - I love him very much and I think he loves me, but he told me today that he doesn't know what he wants except that he wants to be with me forever. I am so tired of always asking him to talk and then when he does it just is about work, nothing else (I am not exaggerating believe me). I do not have hardly any family around, I have a couple of friends, but I am not very social - what scares me most is being alone with nobody that cares about me = am I insane? Why am I so afraid to be alone - I think it is because I have basically no family that cares anything about me. I am normally a positive person but this is taking its toll on me - please give any advice , help!

[JoeCanada76]

Workaholic,

Well I know a few people that are major workaholics and let me tell you because of what I have seen I have done the complete opposite. Just to make sure that I have more time at home and have quality time with my wife and child.

Too much work, just causes tension and grief for the partner at the same time maybe there is a very deep seeded reason why he still feels the need to work. Some people just can not stop working. Some people are naturally just wants to continue to work because it makes them feel useful and alive and keeps their mind busy. Your retired but he is not. That could cause some tension. Now the question is, is it possible that you can get involved in any groups so you could have your own thing to do. Everybody needs an outlit and everybody needs to have another hobbie or something they do on their own. Does this make sense? Even if it was some part time job, or volunteering. Something that will keep you busy and keep you active.

Hope You join a group or do something else and guarantee it will help you.
I also think it is important that your feelings here and concerns are brought up to your husband to, maybe you will find a deep seeded reason on why he feels the need to work so much. Also you have said he has always done that. So I am thinking he has a good reason too, Why not communicate and hopefully you will be able to find a reason. Maybe there will be more of an understanding between the both of you.

Best wishes to you and I know everything will work out the way it is supposed to.

Joe