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    confussed's Avatar
    confussed Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 30, 2007, 10:33 PM
    I'm trapped between two guys
    I have a boyfriend he is in jail, I've been with him for a year. About 4 months ago I met someone, we decided to be friends with benefit, but we got our feelings involved. Now he decided to break up with me, the reason he's catching to many feelings and can't accept the fact that I have a boyfriend. My heart hurts really bad, I feel as if I love this new guy.. but I am obligated to be there for my boyfriend... why am I suffering this break up from the lover? :( :confused:
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #2

    Jun 30, 2007, 10:35 PM
    I would be asking you why are you still with somebody that is in jail, why is this person in jail and how long is he in jail for?
    confussed's Avatar
    confussed Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jun 30, 2007, 10:42 PM
    He is jail for possession of drugs. He was put on probation couldn't handle it and decided to do the time, it's been since February that he's been in jail. Why am I still with him? Because we went through a lot ,he was there when I had my issues it being good or bad. And he has accepted me with my 3 children which no other guy would do... I just feel as if it's not fair for me to back out on him like this.. for another man!!
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #4

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:08 PM
    Well then do not. Leave this other guy in the dust and stick by your man. The man that you have been through a lot with.

    Joe
    confussed's Avatar
    confussed Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:10 PM
    Thanks for your advice.. maybe you are right. I guess I got the attention from my lover since my man is not here, but again why does it hurt so bad to be dumped?
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #6

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:14 PM
    I agree with Jesushelper76 above. Additionally, if you love him, then you will wait for him. It sounds like he has been both a love for you as well as being a sturdy friend. Such a catch is good to have!
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #7

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:14 PM
    It always hurts to be dumped. You will get over it.
    confussed's Avatar
    confussed Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:16 PM
    My lover has asked me to stay friends with him, how do put apart my feelings of friends and lovers?
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #9

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:18 PM
    It was not really love, it was only 4 months. It was something that was caught up in the moment. Support that you were seeking because you were missing your man.

    It was one of those catch you by surprise makes me feel good moments that I know would not last even though it seems like love.

    True love takes time, this was rushed and hurried and carried out at a time where you were vulnerable.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #10

    Jun 30, 2007, 11:25 PM
    Jesushelper76 - It was one of those catch you by surprise makes me feel good moments that I know would not last even though it seems like love.
    Especially if you are already in a true love with someone else.

    Time to separate yourself from the lover. You will also get over that, as will he.
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