[Chalaska]

All right I'll try to keep this to a paragraph. Just over three years ago I met the woman of my dreams. I had been in a depression for seven months over my last girlfriend and this new girl really made me happy. We started dating and we were happy. We did almost everything together and I fell in love with her in only a week. We started dating in June and took a short break in February. She was very upset over it as was I, but I felt it was needed in order to maintain the relationship. Anyway, after that we were on and off again for another year and some, we eventually went to the states together for a month with my family and we had a blast. When we got back though we broke up again. This time it was for a year. It was rough for her and it was rough for me. We were still sleeping together but just everything else I tried to disconnect from her. My feelings for her had not changed but I just felt I needed to be single for my final year of high school. We eventually did get back together. Actually immediately after graduation we did. I found myself thinking about marrying her. She meant the world to me and I just wanted to make her happy from that day forward. I was never really any good though at expressing myself. She got upset every time I went to hang out with my friends and I hated making her upset but I just really enjoyed seeing my friends. Eventually it got to the point though were I didn't like her going to see her friends because all she ever talked about was how other guys hit on her and it made me very jealuos. I was afraid she was going to leave me for someone else. Well last February we were close to it being over forever, and I knew it was my last chance. I vowed to make a lot of changes in my life for her and I talked to her mother and tried to explain myself to her mother as best I could. I told her mother and her that I was going to try to be there more, to not be so controlling and to not treat her as property. Well for the first two months it was great. We were together all the time and I had changed. But than I started hanging out with my friends more and more and she started to get upset about it again. Eventually it got to the point where I had to lie about it. Also she got jealous of every woman I hung out with. I told her there was nothing and ultimately I stopped hanging out with other girls because I didn't want to loose her. In the past month though a lot of things happened. First she lied to me about going camping with her family, where in fact she went camping with some guys and some girls and I knew one of the guys liked her. Another thing is, she has started to detest my mother (my mom is going through a rough time and likes going to the bars) and told me she doesn't feel my family is safe enough to bring children of our own into the world because she doesn't want my mother involved in their lives. And lastly she lied to me about going to the bars. Last Friday (not yesterday) I went out for my normal cruise with my guys. But she texted me and wanted me to come over, I wanted to but I already had a friend with me and didn't want to ditch him. Eventually when I did get home, I called her and told her I would come over but she said "No, its too late now and I have to work in the morning" so I said okay and told her I'd see her tomorrow. The next day after work I tried calling her but she didn't answer. I wanted to make up for the night I missed but she wouldn't return my texts either. Finally she texted me saying her dad was driving her to her friends and was going to go out to the bar and would call me when she got home and loved me. I got very upset about this. I ended up finding her at the bar, and I confronted her. When I did she ran away. She thought I was going to hurt her. I would never hurt her I just wanted to talk to her. She ran behind a couple of guys and they got in my face so I did the right thing and left. The following day she told me it was over and that's when I got very upset. Its almost been a week and I'm afraid she won't come back to me. I love her so much and want to be with her so bad. We've talked a couple times and she says she doesn't know if she wants to be with me again, and she doesn't know if she loves me. She said that night was the last straw and I don't deserve another chance and she just wants time to be alone and to think about it. I want to give her space but at the same time I know if she's alone and thinks about it she'll realize that I wasn't a great boyfriend and won't want me back. I want to prove to her though that I can be and I will never do anything like that again and I won't treat her like property again. I just don't know what to do anymore. I can't eat, I can't sleep, and sometimes I can't breathe. I'm so in love with her and I know if I don't get her back it could very well be the end of my life... please give me some advice.

[Dennis777]

Hello.

Your both young and need time to live life before you worry about forever. Take some time to get to know yourself and let her get to know who she is.

I know its hard but in a short time the hurt will be less and less. Keep busy so your not thinking about her. Make new friends and try starting a new hobby. Keeping your mind busy will make the time pass more quick.

Good Luck
Dennis777

[Lacey5765]

Give her some space and take some yourself. You are to young to make so many changes for someone. You should take time to be with your friends and she should too. If jealousy is an issue there may be a reason. DO you not trust her with other guys? IF so is there a real reason? It sounds as though she may have been looking for a reason to end it. Take some classes, get involved with some new activities. SHe may come back. SHe may not but you shouldn't have to change who you are right now. I know your pain is real. ANd it sounds so easy to say you will get over her but you will. Your first love is very powerful but learn from it. Keep your head up. You will get through it. Calling and begging her back won't work. Good luck to you.

[JoeCanada76]

First - It is a lot longer then a paragraph.

Second - It is best that you go your separate ways and keep it that way.

Third - Go out, enjoy your friends and it is not a good time for a relationship right now. There is no use on continuing this because it will not go any where.

Fourth - Move on, It is over.

Joe

[talaniman]

I think you both have to many personal issues to deal with ,and this doesn't sound like a great fit right now. Yor life is not over and with a little work, you can have a healthier, and more mature attitude as you both seem to possesive, and jealous, with hardly any good honest communications, or regards for each others time and space. You should work beyond this, and slow down when starting a relationship as they will burn themselves out quickly, and present the kinds of problems you spoke of, insecurity, jealousy, mistrust, none of which makes for a consistently loving healthy relationship. Move on and take more time to know someone, before you jump into that love phase.