[DarkHour99]

A few months ago, I cut myself, I couldn't stop and my school councelor found out. My mom knows I did, and so I go to therapy for it... every day when I get in the shower, I look at a razor and just want to take it and cut myself, but the only thing stopping me is the fact that my therapist checks me, how do I stop this!?

[Hephzibah_89]

a few months ago, i cut myself, i couldn't stop and my school councelor found out. my mom knows i did, and so i go to therapy for it... every day when i get in the shower, i look at a razor and just want to take it and cut myself, but the only thing stopping me is the fact that my therapist checks me, how do i stop this!?!?!

Hello again -
I know exactly what you mean... I used to self harm every single day, and even now still doso every so often... I also go to therapy...
Is this something you could talk to your mother about, you say she knows, but could she help if you talked to her? My mother knows and all sharp objects have been removed from my room - and hopeully over time, the therapist should help.
Hopefully you are looking at why you want to do this -if it is to relieve anger, then try kicking/punching a pillow etc
I know that all the things, in my experience, don't quite match up to actually doing it, but in the long run, they will be in your best interests.
Hope this helps, I'm here if you need someone.

[DarkHour99]

I can't talk to my mom about it actaully, she got so mad at me just for finding out, she cried and cried and I hurt me terribly. If she were to find out I still wanted to, it just wouldn't be good! And I can't tell my therapist because she tells my mom everything even though she says she won't (I know, terrible therapist) and I think the reason why I do it is the fact that my father's been in jail for half of my life, but I really don't know, that's the only reason I would.

[Hephzibah_89]

That's fair enough. Often, emotional trauma, (you probably know this, shout if I'm patronising you) can lead to self harm when you are unable to deal with it. Would you be able to search out someone else to talk to? A doctor - the school counsellor? These people are usually bound by confidentiality and want to genuinely help. It doesn't greatly matter why you do it at the present, although getting to the root of the problem is clearly a goal! I've found that focusing my attentions on schoolwork (as levels - agrh!) is helpful, as is exercise -which is also great as it boosts endorphines (or serotonin... or both? I'm not a doctor!), making you happier.
How about speaking to your mother about helping avoid it happening again... no need to tell her about any incidents, just let her know you need her help in never doing it again - ?

[DarkHour99]

All right, thank you very much for your help :) and on the whole school counselor thing, hahaha nooo, he told me about someone else cutting when he found out I did, therefour I don't trust him lol, but thank you sooo much, I really think it'll help :)

[Hephzibah_89]

Oh dear! Well, good luck, I hope things get better for you. :)

[DarkHour99]

Lol, and I hope things get better for you as well :)