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    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:06 PM
    Confused about my girlfriend
    [14:24] Chaos: I love you Caat
    [14:24] renegade622: W/E!
    [14:24] Chaos: Wow... pissy much?
    [14:25] renegade622:...
    [14:25] renegade622: Go **** yourself
    [14:26] Chaos: What's wrong?
    [14:29] Chaos: All right w/e I'm going, Cya later
    [14:29] renegade622: Wait
    [14:29] Chaos: Yeah?
    [14:29] renegade622: Why?
    [14:29] Chaos: Why what? Why am I going?
    [14:29] renegade622: Yea
    [14:29] Chaos: Got to go to work
    [14:30] Chaos: Why?
    [14:30] renegade622: Fine w/e
    [14:30] renegade622: Go
    [14:30] Chaos: I'm sorry
    [14:30] Chaos: I can stay and talk for a bit if you want to
    [14:30] renegade622: No
    [14:30] renegade622: Im getting sick of you
    [14:31] Chaos: Ok see you
    [14:32] Chaos: I just want to know before I go, was that serious
    [14:33] renegade622: Yea
    [14:33] renegade622: It was
    [14:33] Chaos: Then we're breaking up?
    [14:33] renegade622: No.

    This was a conversion me and my g/f had over instant messaging. It's a month in, and we say we love each other each day. But I think I've been saying it too much and she's told me this. I can't stop though because 1) I love her and 2) She's got a lot of guy friends so I get nervous that she might... I don't know... "forget" that she does. My friends say that it's a normal thing for girls to have lots of guy friends and you just need to give them no reason to leave. But the problem is I don't know what I have over those other guys, why she chose me instead. I love her because she's my perfect girl... she's beautiful and enjoys all the same things I do. Please give me help!
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:09 PM
    First of all you need to back off a bit. Sounds like your really getting on her nerves. Please do not continue what your doing because it is not working.

    Oh, Another thing about instant messaging there is many different misunderstandings. Misunderstandings can be avoided if maybe when you chat it is face to face.

    Joe
    nauticalstar420's Avatar
    nauticalstar420 Posts: 3,699, Reputation: 423
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:10 PM
    If you don't mind me asking, how old is she? I remember playing mind games like this with guys when I was in high school. She sounds like she is unsure of what she wants. Try just talking to her about it. Ask her if she needs space. If she does, give it to her. If it is meant to be then she will be running back with open arms :)
    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #4

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:13 PM
    She's 17 and I'm 16. She has done "tests" of faith for me, but this is the first time she said it was actually serious and I'm starting to get a little depressed because I really like her, but I think I think I'm driving her away.
    nauticalstar420's Avatar
    nauticalstar420 Posts: 3,699, Reputation: 423
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:14 PM
    Just give her space. She might feel a little smothered. There are other ways of showing you love someone besides actually saying "I love you" all the time.
    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
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    #6

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:15 PM
    But if I give her space I'm afraid that she'll leave me for another guy!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #7

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:16 PM
    Stop being insecure. Can't you see she is tired of it. Rightfully so. One month in is fun time. Babysitting is not fun, but a chore with no returns. If you don't give her space she will leave, so you better work on your problem and get it together, or be alone.
    nauticalstar420's Avatar
    nauticalstar420 Posts: 3,699, Reputation: 423
    Ultra Member
     
    #8

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:16 PM
    She will also leave you if she feels smothered. At least if you give her some space you can see where it goes from there. It might turn around for the better.
    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #9

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:21 PM
    All right I give her space... until she says that she's ready to talk?
    nauticalstar420's Avatar
    nauticalstar420 Posts: 3,699, Reputation: 423
    Ultra Member
     
    #10

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:27 PM
    Yes. Let her have some time to gather her thoughts and she will more than likely contact you after she's had some time to think and some time to herself.
    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #11

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:28 PM
    All right thanks for the help
    nauticalstar420's Avatar
    nauticalstar420 Posts: 3,699, Reputation: 423
    Ultra Member
     
    #12

    Jun 18, 2007, 03:30 PM
    You're very welcome :)
    chaos001's Avatar
    chaos001 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #13

    Jun 18, 2007, 07:27 PM
    We broke up. She said that she doesn't feel like she's in love with me as a boyfriend, but loves me as a friend and has felt this way for the past week. I don't want her to leave my life completely but I can't handle being just friends with her because even though she doesn't, I still love her.
    Ash123's Avatar
    Ash123 Posts: 1,793, Reputation: 305
    Ultra Member
     
    #14

    Jun 18, 2007, 07:33 PM
    Wow. Well, I guess the moral of the story is:
    If you're going to break up - IM is about the fastest and most efficient way to do it.


    Conversely, I hope it can become one of the fastest way to find a date for you as well!
    Stunning07's Avatar
    Stunning07 Posts: 193, Reputation: 25
    Junior Member
     
    #15

    Jun 18, 2007, 08:30 PM
    Don't be clingy and let her win... don't take her $hitt all the time

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