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merc248 · Jun 17, 2007, 07:32 PM

I understand from reading a few of the posts on this website that the key thing to do is to absolutely have no contact.

However, I'm head over heels for this girl.

She broke up with me after a month of dating, saying that she didn't think we "romantically clicked," though we seemed to hit it off especially well two days before she told me this. I know it's only been one month, but I'm already falling for her, and I couldn't even stop thinking about her throughout the one month. I want to get back together with her for a second chance at romance or whatever else, but I have no idea on how to approach it.

She did invite me to a party this coming Friday, which I might go to to at least meet a few new people, but I have no idea if I should try talking to her before then about how I feel about all of this.

What do you guys suggest?

talaniman · Jun 18, 2007, 06:43 AM

I can only suggest that even though you have fallen very quickly, she has not. So for now accept that her feelings have changed, and leave her alone, and have fun meeting new people, and doing the things you enjoy, without her.

moomin007 · Jun 18, 2007, 06:51 AM

As T-man says, leave her alone.
Have fun being single. She may or may not change her mind but don't hang around waiting for it. It may neva happen.

Some things are just not meant to be, no matter now hard we wish for it!
Moomin
:)

merc248 · Jun 18, 2007, 12:39 PM

All right... well, I talked to her for an hour and a half last night about pretty much nothing.

Maybe I'm overanalyzing too much, but the subject of astrological signs came up, and she mentioned that while we were dating, she looked up both of our signs and saw that we are extremely compatible.

I don't really believe in the astrological sign stuff, but I'm a bit off put by the comment in terms of what her intentions might be. I don't know. Just a thought.

Jiser · Jun 18, 2007, 12:55 PM

Doesn't matter what she thinks, what matters is you, get a life wheer your happy alone and one day soemone will come along and will want to be part of the fun your having. You can choose then if you want it or not. Be a man!

emopunk7 · Jun 18, 2007, 01:52 PM

What do you mean talked about nothing?

merc248 · Jun 18, 2007, 02:13 PM

You know... random topics, things that didn't really pertain too much of anything.

s_cianci · Jun 18, 2007, 02:29 PM

I wonder if she perceives you as being too needy or insecure? It sounds like that may be the case here. Go to the party but don't talk to her before then. When you get there, spend the majority of the time talking with other people. Capitalize on the opportunity to meet as many new people as you can. When she sees that you don't need to be constantly clinging to her all the time, that may make you more attractive to her.

merc248 · Jun 20, 2007, 12:15 PM

I'll try doing that.

I've been avoiding contact so far, though she did IM me last night in order to tell me about the party changing to Saturday, and as well as her friend who acted cold the night before (which I doubt is true for whatever reason.)

In any case, I'm going to stay incommunicado for a while longer.

It's ridiculously hard, I continuously think about her; I had an hour long math lecture earlier this morning and all I could think about was her.

I'm thinking that after the party, I'll continue to avoid contact for another couple of weeks. That should do it, I think.

Felly123 · Jun 20, 2007, 12:36 PM

Well, this is my opinion.
If I were u, I would let her go. Just be friends. Because after one month, she took a judge. And she must have only been there for the sex because, the way I see it. Love isn't about the touching, its about see who people really are. And loving the for what they aren't.
If that helps any.

Go to the party. Have a good time. Yes talk to her. But be friends then take it from there.

-Felicity

SAB123 · Jun 20, 2007, 01:08 PM

Being friends first is the way to go because you don't get emotionally attached to the person and if it doesn't work you can still be friends and no one gets their heart broken. My ex wasn't but I was friends with her for 3 months before I started giving her my heart.
She said she loved me the first month.

merc248 · Jun 20, 2007, 06:44 PM

Originally Posted by Felly123

well, this is my opinion.
if i were u, i would let her go. just be friends. because after one month, she took a judge. and she must have only been there for the sex because, the way i see it. love isnt about the touching, its about see who people really are. and loving the for what they arent.
if that helps any.

go to the party. have a good time. yes talk to her. but be friends then take it from there.

-Felicity

It could be.

She got out of a relationship about three weeks or so before our first date. Though we never had sex; I made the mistake of asking for it (I had no idea what to do, she was the very first person I ever had any sort of relationship with.)

I was willing to see through her faults and other stuff; I don't know if she could say the same for me, though she was definitely open to hearing me out in a few cases when I've hit the rocks.

I'm still thinking about that conversation we had last Sunday when she brought up the astrological signs, though it might not even mean much to her; I've looked it up since she mentioned it and it listed down so many traits that I've noticed in both of us in general.

Dammit.

I'm pretty drunk right now, if this makes no sense then let me know