[LindsayV]

Hi, I am 26 years old and my husband and I have been trying to conceive for over a year now. We are working with a fertility specialist and I have had numerous tests done, gone through cycle monitoring while using clomid and femara as well as 3 intrauterine inseminations. They were all perfectly timed. My husband has also been checked a few times and his sperm count is just fine. It appears as though I am ovulating regularly and I am producing enough mature follicles but nothing seems to be happening. The only thing that is abnormal with my cycle is that it is typically only 25 or 26 days long (but everyone is different right?) In my early twenties it was typically 28 days, so it has shortened a little over the past few years. Could that mean anything? We are getting really scared that something serious is wrong. I know getting pregnant can sometimes not be easy, but I really don't understand why nothing has happened by now. Not even a miscarriage. I would almost feel better at least knowing I could conceive... sigh. Anyway, if there is anyone out there in a situation like this, I would love to receive some feedback.

[rankrank55]

I am not going through the same thing as you but I responded so that your message will be sent back to the top of the list for others to see. My cycles are about 26 days long and I recently became pregnant but had a miscarriage at about 5 weeks. Good luck to you!

[NowWhat]

The normal range for a menstral cycle can be from 19 days to 35 days. So you are in the "Normal" range.
If your doctor is telling you that you are fine and your husband is fine - then I would say that you have stressed yourself out.
Relax and try to stay calm. If you can do that - you might find that you will be pregnant.
Good Luck!

[LindsayV]

Thanks for your replies! Congratulations to rankrank55 on your recent pregnancy! That is fabulous:o) Sometimes I worry that I might be stressing myself out over not conceiving but it's so hard to tell. It's something that I really care about so I have a hard time letting it all go and not caring if I fall pregnant each month or not. I'm sure that is normal though? I think I will take your advice and try a little harder to stay relaxed and calm. I think I am having an even harder time these days because everyone around me is either falling pregnant or having a baby. Sure doesn't make it easier. Thanks again for your comments:o)

[automansgirl]

I can somewhat understand your frustration. My husband and I actively tried to get pregnant for 6 months before falling pregnant. We did have a lot of set-backs, though. I missed a period for no reason, then I had to have a biopsy, and finally I had to have a small piece of my cervix removed. This final procedure actuall allowed us to get pregnant. Not in any way because of the medical procedure, but because we weren't ably to "try" that month. I was waiting for my period to come so I could start calculating ovulation for the next month, but it never came. After being 10 days late I finally got a positive result. I had my first u/s at 7 weeks, but it found that I had ovulated late, and I actually conceived the day before I was supposed to get my period, putting me back to 5 weeks. Once I finally stopped stressing over becoming pregnant it happened. I also have a friend who was told she had unexplained infertility after a year and a half of trying. She was scheduled to have testing done, and was waiting for the results of some other tests already done and stopped trying and gave up hope without the help of a doctor. She just found out she is 6 weeks pregnant! Maybe you should take a break for a little bit and see what happens. I will keep my fingers crossed for you!

[baby broody]

My cycles are about 26 days long and I recently became pregnant but had a miscarriage at about 5 weeks.

you congratulated rankrank55 on her pregnancy but i dont think you read her post properly, she had a miscarriage at 5 weeks.:(
as for yourself I know how stressful it can be conceiving me and my husband have only been trying 2 months and its getting to me. I have an average cycle of 28 days every month so fingers x. just don't stress over it too much, I know it frustrating but keep trying and hopefully u should get result

[LadyB]

You don't mention an HSG. Have they checked your tubes for blockages?

A large percentage of infertility is "unexplained". I can't imagine how frustrating that is. Perhaps you could join an infertility support group like RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association: homepage to talk with others in the same situation.

[LindsayV]

I am so sorry about that rankrank55. I'm not sure how I read that wrong. I am so sorry about your loss. Keep on trying, it will happen. I don't mean to be insensitive, but I think it is good that you know you can conceive. I know it is still hard to deal with, but I know a few people that have had miscarriages and went on to have a healthy baby. I'm sending lots of sticky baby dust out to you :o)

[LindsayV]

I did have an HSG and they found that my tubes are clear. My doctor has a few concerns about endometriosis because since taking fertility meds, I have been experiencing some pain during my period that I have never really experienced before. My period isn't very heavy though and I thought that was a sign of endo?? My doctor says that from his experience he believes that taking fertility meds can sometimes progress endometriosis, therefore, increasing the symptoms. The bad part is the only way they can tell for sure is through laparascopy. I am scheduled to get a laparascopy next week Wednesday. It will be my first surgery so I am a little nervous.

[LadyB]

The lap is really the last thing they can do it sounds like. Please keep us posted.

It's normal to be nervous about surgery, but try to relax. Meditate, pray, do yoga, knit... whatever helps you stay calm and focused. Sometimes knowing you are doing all you can to help try to solve a problem is consolation... definitely a sign of strength. I have had so many surgeries I just look forward to the nap anymore ;)

[buggage]

I know how frustrating it can be. It took hubby and I 12 months to conceive our second son(after we instantly got pregnant with our first son, it was frustrating that it was taking so long with our second son, and it was making me very nervous that something was really wrong. But nothing was wrong, and it just took a while to get there, is all.)It could be that there is absolutely nothing wrong at all either of you. I knew a couple when I was growing up, I use to babysit their little girl that they adopted. They adopted her because they didn't think they could have kids. There was no reason they couldn't, but they had been trying their whole marriage, and nothing ever came of it, so they gave up. Finally they received a shock and found out she was pregnant. She was about 40 something at the time. Haha, now I know that probably doesn't console you much. Sorry. I'm just trying to say, don't give up hope, because you never know. And also, in perspective of her trying for what... 15+ years, a little over ayear doesn't seem so bad, right? ;0) good luck hun, I wish you the best. And as far as the surgery goes, my friend had that done, and she said it was not bad at all. It's a very tiny incision and (if I'm remembering correctly) an out patient surgery, so she got to leave after a couple of hours. Keep us posted and good luck

[LindsayV]

Wow, that is quite a story. Suddenly I don't feel as bad that we've been trying for just over a year. 15+ years is definitely torture... I'm happy to hear they got pregnant! What a miracle. Thanks for helping me feel more hopeful about it eventually happening. Sometimes you get stuck in a rut with all the negative feelings and it's hard to imagine that it will ever happen. I guess we just have to keep trying and try our best to stay positive. Congratulations on your 2nd son! That is wonderful!

[LadyB]

We went 14 years and then adopted. However I had a definitive diagnosis which makes it a little easier to accept.

[LindsayV]

Really... if you don't mind me asking, what was your diagnosis? Did you go through in-vitro at all before adoption? Congratulations by the way on your adoption. Sometimes adoption can take a really long time as well. How was the whole adoption process for you? Even if we do get pregnant, I am still interested in adopting at some point... I think it is such a beautiful gift to give a child.

[Trying_again]

I tried also for 15 months. Then I tried ov-watch. It really helped with the stressing out since it gave me 4 days notice as to when I was going to ovulate. We tried for 2 cycles using the watch and got pregnant. In September when we try again I am breaking out my watch so there is no stress or pressure. Good luck to you.

[Myth]

Take a vacation and don't think about it. Your getting yourself all excited about the result without enjoying the now. Forget about trying to conceive and just have some fun... Act like kids... gross out teens with public displays of affections and forget about the baby you want... Think about the baby *hubby* you have and enjoy time with him, cause once you get preggy you won't have a whole lot of time with each other.

[LindsayV]

Well, It's really not stress that is causing my infertility. I had my laparoscopy done yesterday and it turns out I have a pretty bad case of endometriosis. The doctor got as much as he could and he is putting me on hormone therapy to get rid of any he wasn't able to get. Telling women that the cause is from them stressing themselves out is not really encouraging. It basically just made me feel bad that I may be causing this. I am very careful with what I tell women who are going through infertility because the last thing I want to do is make them feel bad or guilty. I understand that severe stress may cause a delay in pregnancy but I think it is pretty normal, if not inevitable that a women dealing with infertility is going to get upset, dissapointed, sad or even angry from time to time. It's NORMAL!! Anyway, I just want to let the women who are going through this know that they really shouldn't blame themselves.

[LadyB]

really....if you don't mind me asking, what was your diagnosis? Did you go through in-vitro at all before adoption? Congratulations by the way on your adoption. Sometimes adoption can take a really long time as well. How was the whole adoption process for you? Even if we do get pregnant, I am still interested in adopting at some point...I think it is such a beautiful gift to give a child.

My initial diagnosis was blocked tubes, and I even had to have one removed due to a condition called hydrosalpinx which caused me pain and can cause IVF failures as well. Underwent IVF 3 times and each failed. Most of my eggs were not "mature" and those that were fertilized well, grew well for three days, but completely failed to implant.

The adoption literally fell out of the sky for us. We had no plans to adopt, and were considering fostering, when we were approached through a friend of a friend situation about adopting. Seems we were exactly the type of people this younger couple was looking for to adopt their soon to be born son. So, we got the homestudy and did the legal stuff, but other than that we avoided the "waiting" that is the hardest part I am told.

[alkalineangel]

Well, It's really not stress that is causing my infertility. I had my laparoscopy done yesterday and it turns out I have a pretty bad case of endometriosis. The doctor got as much as he could and he is putting me on hormone therapy to get rid of any he wasn't able to get. Telling women that the cause is from them stressing themselves out is not really encouraging. It basically just made me feel bad that I may be causing this. I am very careful with what I tell women who are going through infertility because the last thing I want to do is make them feel bad or guilty. I understand that severe stress may cause a delay in pregnancy but I think it is pretty normal, if not inevitable that a women dealing with infertility is going to get upset, dissapointed, sad or even angry from time to time. It's NORMAL!!!! Anyway, I just want to let the women who are going through this know that they really shouldn't blame themselves.

I don't think she meant it as to blame yourself. She was just trying to give the facts. It would be easy to sit here and try to give people answers that would make them as comfortable as possible, but the job here is to give people answers that are true and will help them be better informed. A lot of women are affected by stress and don't even realize that is the problem, IM not saying all women, because there are many who have legitimate reasons such as yourself, and several of my friends. But I am going to defend MYTH in saying that I think it is good Not to sugar coat things in this situation. We all have feelings here and we understand it is difficult, and many of us, and many people that we know have all suffered in this area, so we understand, but I have always been a firm believer that you should inform people of the truth and not what you think will make them feel better about things. It is a tough and very sensitive topic, and I am not wanting to seem angry or uncaring here, just trying to help you understand where MYTH was coming from. We see all kinds of people and problems here. Good luck to you, and I hope all works out for you in the future.

[rebecca3877]

Hi, I am 26 years old and my husband and I have been trying to conceive for over a year now. We are working with a fertility specialist and I have had numerous tests done, gone through cycle monitoring while using clomid and femara as well as 3 intrauterine inseminations. They were all perfectly timed. My husband has also been checked a few times and his sperm count is just fine. It appears as though I am ovulating regularly and I am producing enough mature follicles but nothing seems to be happening. The only thing that is abnormal with my cycle is that it is typically only 25 or 26 days long (but everyone is different right?) In my early twenties it was typically 28 days, so it has shortened a little over the past few years. Could that mean anything? We are getting really scared that something serious is wrong. I know getting pregnant can sometimes not be easy, but I really don't understand why nothing has happened by now. Not even a miscarriage. I would almost feel better at least knowing I could conceive....sigh. Anyway, if there is anyone out there in a situation like this, I would love to receive some feedback.

Hiya Lindsay. Just read your message and I can totally relate to what you are going through. Me and my partner have been trying to conceive for over a year now (it has been 15 months since my depo injection ran out) and we have had no luck. I have pretty regular periods, varying between about 26 and 31 days, which I think is regular and I have been looking at all the ovulation calculators and trying around them times(and over the times as well) and we have had no luck. I am getting really upset about it and its stressing us both out. The thing is though he already has a 4 year old son from a previous realationship and I have a 6 year old daughter from a previos realationship. And we both used to smoke but stopped about 18 months ago, we eat pretty healthily and I am too scared to go to the doc, because that will cause even more stress and I just want to get pregnant without going g to the doc(I did before and that only took about 7 months.)