[beauty_in_bed]

Hiya I'm 21 and why boyfriend wants a threesome. I'm quite into the iea myself as I think its quite a turn on. But I darent ask anyone at uni how they would feel about joing in with me and my partner... and have found that dating sites don't work. Any ideas? :p

[smoothy]

Many people have found levels of jealousy they didn't even know they had during or after the act. Some people can't deal with it and jealousy is a hungry beast, while a few can. Is it practically every guys fantasy? Damn tootin.

I've done it a few times but that was over 26 years ago and it was the women driving it not me. With both groups the two women had a relationship that predated my involvement.

No I didn't marry any of them... but that was for other unrelated issues.

[BMI]

Smoothy you old dog, I'm jealous as heck.

Beauty - I have spent a good deal of time during my active sexual life pondering this very question. I have come close, due to various administrative problems and red tape it has always fallen through:(. Right place at the right time I guess (15 years and that's all I have come up with?)

I wouldn't ask outright, dance around it and gauge responses you get from other girls, or maybe you'll get lucky and it'll fall on your lap(his lap). Ohh that would be something.

For all the other posters to come, please help this young girl with your helpful thoughts and past experiences, tips, etc. She really could use the help, poor thing.

P.S Not like I'm going to be taking notes or anything.

[mirandycc]

I myself have done a threesome with my past boyfriends, and even with my husband. It is a wonderful experience like none other... if he will let you u should try not only two girls and him, but two guys and you. That is good too. You really do have to put all jealousy aside, and realize it is all for the pleasure of sex. You also have to trust the third party to the full extent, cause if you don't the thought of "is she trying to steal my man " will probably enter your mind.

HOPE I HELPED U SOME, if not let me know.

[rodandy12]

Where I live there is a publication called "Creative Loafing." I bet there is something similar in most large cities. It has a fairly extensive personnels section in the classifieds. I haven't read it for a while, but I recall many personnels requesting threesomes. There is probably an on-line equivalent these days. Maybe that is the dating site you are referring to.

I had a friend who once tried this route to find someone to do something kinky he was looking for. He told me he was about 10% successful... one out of ten inquiries he made worked out to someone willing to provide him what he needed. Seemed like a lot of effort to me. He also told me that many of the folks placing the personnels were hookers.

That might be bad, but on the other hand, maybe you are looking for professional help here?

[Choux]

Don't be too quick to rush into disaster!

If you find out that the third party is having couple-sex with your boyfriend, how would you feel, jealous, left-out, unloved, and angry? Plus, your reputation?

If you have to have a threesome under the influence of alcohol or drugs, you know you are doing something that is wrong for you.

[smoothy]

Don't be too quick to rush into disaster!

If you find out that the third party is having couple-sex with your boyfriend, how would you feel, jealous, left-out, unloved, and angry? Plus, your reputation?

If you have to have a threesome under the influence of alcohol or drugs, you know you are doing something that is wrong for you.

That's the Hungry beast jealousy I referred to...

[Choux]

Lol!

[Synnen]

Threesomes can be fun IF you go into them the right way.

Do some research online--there are several sites devoted to it. Most of the sites have the hard questions you need to ask yourselves--and a list of good rules to follow.

MAKE SURE--no matter HOW you meet the person that you ask to join you (a friend is usually best, though that can backfire too) that you make sure you get STD testing done. Better safe than sorry.

The BIGGEST mistake most couples make is NOT discussing and talking about it ahead of time, including a ton of "what if" situations. Rules are not only advisable, they are necessary. And, not only that, the rules have to be established TWICE---once between you and your partner, and once again once you've added that third person.

If at ANY point someone is not comfortable (including the 3rd party), then ALL activity needs to stop immediately, with no reprisals.

Most couples can NOT make this work. Trust and love are essential in a threesome--you have to trust that you love each other, and the third person is just that--a third person. You have to BELIEVE in the love the other person has for you, and you have to trust that they will tell you the truth about their experiences, including the emotions involved. You ALSO have to trust them enough to tell the truth about YOUR feelings and emotions about the whole thing.

I really REALLY suggest at least 6 months of on-again-off-again discussion about it between you and your man, with research into it being done by BOTH of you.