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MiSSsy111222 · Mar 8, 2009, 08:58 AM

Hmmm my NC number is over a month I think. I'm quite proud of myself :) can't be botherd to count the days. I'm just going along with it now.

hungtoronto · Mar 11, 2009, 11:04 AM

It has been a while since I was here. I just want to give you guys an update. I've been with the new girl for over a month now. Everything is great so far. I do miss my ex sometime but I don't feel the pain anymore. I don't know if you can ever forget about the ex. But it doesn't mean that you can't move on.

As for my ex, she is in worse shape than I am. Her new business crumbled. She is depressed and scared and no one to talk to. I didn't talk to her but I got my sources. She left me and thought the grass was greener on the other side but it wasn't. I felt sorry for her though but I know I can't go back with her. It will not be the same.

I am on the other hand moving on pretty well thanks to all the people on here. I listen to your advices and went NC. I work out everyday with my new girl and in the best shape of my life. NC worked for me and only in a short time I was able to move on.

talaniman · Mar 11, 2009, 01:30 PM

Now that's good news. The best way to make time fly, is to have fun.

Dare81 · Mar 12, 2009, 03:31 AM

Good going Toronto! Keep it up.

Boristheblade · Mar 13, 2009, 04:52 PM

My ex is with someone new and it devastated me. I still have not moved on. It has been 9 months since we broke up, I go to counselling and am in NC and have been for awhile, but STILL I die inside everyday.

WHY IS EVERYONE MOVING ON AND I CONCENTRATE ON BEING CONTENT WITH WHAT I HAVE IN MY LIFE AND AM STILL SO ANGRY AND SO HURT AND IN EMOTIONAL TURMOIL??

none12345 · Mar 13, 2009, 09:09 PM

Hey guys I'm new this this NC thread. Today is day 8 of NC, still love her, still want to be with her, still thinking of her, still dreaming of her but it has gotten better than day one. I wonder what she's up to I want to call her so bad never been so long away from her there wasn't a day that went by that we didn't talk. Oh by the way she broke up with me because some guy confessed to her and now she's spending more time with him and starting to like him a lot... I've felt like I've been through hell and back and it hurts me so much to see her with him. Known her for 5 years been with her for 2... any advice?

Dare81 · Mar 13, 2009, 11:58 PM

Originally Posted by Boristheblade

My ex is with someone new and it devastated me. I still have not moved on. It has been 9 months since we broke up, I go to counselling and am in NC and have been for awhile, but STILL I die inside everyday.

WHY IS EVERYONE MOVING ON AND I CONCENTRATE ON BEING CONTENT WITH WHAT I HAVE IN MY LIFE AND AM STILL SO ANGRY AND SO HURT AND IN EMOTIONAL TURMOIL???

Some people take longer to move on.Some people move on a lot quicker.Be patient and give yourself time.You will eventually get there

Dare81 · Mar 14, 2009, 12:00 AM

Originally Posted by none12345

hey guys im new this this NC thread. Today is day 8 of NC, still love her, still wanna be with her, still thinking of her, still dreaming of her but it has gotten better than day one. i wonder what she's up to i wanna call her so bad never been so long away from her there wasnt a day that went by that we didnt talk. oh by the way she broke up with me because some guy confessed to her and now she's spending more time with him and starting to like him alot.... i've felt like i've been thru hell and back and it hurts me so much to see her with him. known her for 5 years been with her for 2... any advice?

It is going to hurt like anything for the next couple of months, make sure you keep yourself busy.Workout,Keep yourself distracted.Eventually you wlll move on and find someone wonderful.Again the key is keeping yourself busy

talaniman · Mar 14, 2009, 04:12 AM

Originally Posted by Boristheblade

My ex is with someone new and it devastated me. I still have not moved on. It has been 9 months since we broke up, I go to counseling and am in NC and have been for awhile, but STILL I die inside everyday.

Maybe you haven't moved on completely, but you have moved on. I suspect that hearing the news of your b/f finding someone else has aroused some old feelings again. Normal for us humans, but this storm will pass. You already know there are no quick fixes and it takes time.

You must remember what your healing from, and how long you have been dealing with this issue, so you've only been out of each others life since February, and that's not long at all. Stay on your path, make one small step at a time.

f104 · May 31, 2009, 05:17 PM

Hey guys. It has almost been a year of NC for me. It is hard initially but it feels good. Hang in there one day at a time.

naturallydelici · Jun 3, 2009, 11:01 PM

f104: That's awesome.

About a month and a half, here.

So, when is it that you finally let go and stop wanting things you can't have/that are no good for you ;)?

f104 · Jun 4, 2009, 08:41 PM

Originally Posted by naturallydelici

f104: That's awesome.

About a month and a half, here.

So, when is it that you finally let go and stop wanting things you can't have/that are no good for you ;)?

It seems to be an ongoing process. I still think about her, but no more than any of my other exes. She is now just another past relationship. I do not hate her and sometimes I think "what if?" Usually though I am thankful that the relationship is over. Over the course of time I have found it is easier to assess the good and bad points of the relationship.

Each day that goes by seems to mean a little more freedom. You will make it through this. Just take it one day at a time. This board and especially the people on this thread are lifesavers in my opinion.

Funny, but I found this board about 2 weeks before she dumped me. I immediately saved it in my bookmarks and never told her about it. I think that often our subconscience is more aware of the state of the relationship than we may be ready to admit.

COCADA · Jul 6, 2009, 01:37 PM

I really wish I should have seen this forum before doing all the BIG frekin mess I did when my ex broke up with me over the phone after more than a year together . When he broke up with me I was OK the first week, after that I started tripping out BAD, I was so hurt , I lost total control of my feelings, I sent him HATE texts every weekend for over 4 months, telling him exactly how I felt, and what I thought about him, I disrespected him horribly, I told him that I felt like he never loved me, that everything was a lie all the " I love you" all the "I'll keep you forever" and "I will never hurt you" , I told him that he was a fake for telling me all that, I told him that I hated him, that he was a jerk, and that he was a player because he played with my feeling throughout the whole relationship. I was emotionally destroyed by the break up, I was a wreck.

OMG, I was horrible and mean, and every time I sent him a hate text I would cry like a baby after, I was in so much anger and pain. But I kept doing and doing it, hurting myself even more, without thinking that I was hurting him too by telling him all that, he was very respectful through out the whole texting, he never said a bad word to me, and ke kept saying that he loved me and that he always will, for some reason that made me even madder and more upset, because I thought that he was still lying to me.

Maybe he wasn't lying, but I just couldn't understand whey he kept saying that to me and didn't want to be with me, I know you can't force someone into being with you, but why do he kept saying that he loved me ? He said that he loved me very much but it wasn't the right time to be together, that he had to concentrate on school, not on me. I always supported him on his studies, I loved that he studied and wanted to be successful and I loved sharing that with him, while I was In school to. He broke up with me so out of the blue. I regret so much sending him all those messages, when at the same time I wanted to be with him again so bad, but I knew I couldn't work anymore, the damage was already done, He hurt me by breaking up with me and I hurt him by losing control over my feelings with all those hate texts.

I'ts been a month since I stop all that, but I sometimes still beat myself up by thinking " I should have been stronger", " I should have respected him and his decision" , " I should have le go of my pain some other way". Now I know is all lost, and It all ended up so dramatic, but I have to deal with it and move on, I just want to stop beating myself up for that.

COCADA · Jul 6, 2009, 02:33 PM

Originally Posted by Boristheblade

My ex is with someone new and it devastated me. I still have not moved on. It has been 9 months since we broke up, I go to counselling and am in NC and have been for awhile, but STILL I die inside everyday.

WHY IS EVERYONE MOVING ON AND I CONCENTRATE ON BEING CONTENT WITH WHAT I HAVE IN MY LIFE AND AM STILL SO ANGRY AND SO HURT AND IN EMOTIONAL TURMOIL???

I Understand what you going through. After 5 months I still feel pain.

COCADA · Jul 6, 2009, 03:35 PM

Originally Posted by Boristheblade

My ex is with someone new and it devastated me. I still have not moved on. It has been 9 months since we broke up, I go to counselling and am in NC and have been for awhile, but STILL I die inside everyday.

WHY IS EVERYONE MOVING ON AND I CONCENTRATE ON BEING CONTENT WITH WHAT I HAVE IN MY LIFE AND AM STILL SO ANGRY AND SO HURT AND IN EMOTIONAL TURMOIL???

How long have you been in NC?

COCADA · Jul 7, 2009, 01:29 PM

It's been 5 months since he broke up with me, I haven't seen him since then, how come I still think about him so much and miss him everyday?

Dare81 · Jul 7, 2009, 03:44 PM

Originally Posted by COCADA

It's been 5 months since he broke up with me, I havent seen him since then, how come I still think about him so much and miss him everyday?

How long were you two togather for?

COCADA · Jul 7, 2009, 03:50 PM

Originally Posted by Dare81

How long were you two togather for?

Almost two years

COCADA · Jul 8, 2009, 11:01 AM

Originally Posted by COCADA

I really wish I should have seen this forum before doing all the BIG frekin mess I did when my ex broke up with me over the phone after more than a year together . When he broke up with me I was ok the first week, after that I started tripping out BAD, I was so hurt , I lost total control of my feelings, I sent him HATE texts every weekend for over 4 months, telling him exactly how I felt, and what I thought about him, I disrespected him horribly, I told him that I felt like he never loved me, that everything was a lie all the " I love you" all the "I'll keep you forever" and "I will never hurt you" , I told him that he was a fake for telling me all that, I told him that I hated him, that he was a jerk, and that he was a player because he played with my feeling throughout the whole relationship. I was emotionally destroyed by the break up, I was a wreck.

OMG, I was horrible and mean, and everytime I sent him a hate text I would cry like a baby after, I was in so much anger and pain. But I kept doing and doing it, hurting myself even more, without thinking that I was hurting him too by telling him all that, he was very respectful through out the whole texting, he never said a bad word to me, and ke kept saying that he loved me and that he always will, for some reason that made me even madder and more upset, because I thought that he was still lying to me.

Maybe he wasnt lying, but I just couldnt understand whey he kept saying that to me and didn't want to be with me, I know you can't force someone into being with you, but why do he kept saying that he loved me ? He said that he loved me very much but it wasn't the right time to be together, that he had to concentrate on school, not on me. I alway supported him on his studies, I loved that he studied and wanted to be succesful and I loved sharing that with him, while I was In school to. He broke up with me so out of the blue. I regret so much sending him all those messages, when at the same time I wanted to be with him again so bad, but I knew I couldn't work anymore, the damage was already done, He hurt me by breaking up with me and I hurt him by losing control over my feelings with all those hate texts.

I'ts been a month since I stop all that, but I sometimes still beat myself up by thinking " I should have been stronger", " I should have respected him and his decision" , " I should have le go of my pain some other way". Now I know is all lost, and It all ended up so dramatic, but I have to deal with it and move on, I just want to stop beating myself up for that.

Should I tell him I am sorry for what I did, for what I told him and for not leaving him alone for such a long time? I don't want things to ens like between us, sometimes I just can't sleep thinking on how mean I was to him, I was very hurt when I told him all of these things but I regret it so bad, maybe he doesn't care about it at all but I feel horrible for everything that I told him . Please someone tell me what to do. I really need some advice, I am desperate , don't know what to do. :confused::confused:

talaniman · Jul 8, 2009, 01:05 PM

Stick with No Contact, and deal with your feelings in a positive way for yourself. The best thing you can do for you is realize your mistakes and don't repeat them, but for now the healing has to go through its process. You can make amends after that.