[HotHoneyVintage]

OK well I don't have nothing to focus on. Don't know anything to pick. Social anxieties hold people back in life from doing almost everythign so what's the point anymore. I don't see none.

[talaniman]

Then you have to be open to getting help for those social anxieties, and sticking with it. It takes time, often years for "normal" people to over come their personal issues, and start putting together a semblance of a normal, healthy, happy life. You have to just stick to it, and take baby steps until you are able to walk, then run to what you want.

The point is don't quit on yourself, keep going, slowly maybe, but steadily. That's how we all "GET IT". We have to keep going until we do. That's the point.

Heck, I paid a guy good money to tell me over, and over, I wasn't crazy, I just did crazy things. Well DUH, I use to tell him, so if I stopped doing crazy things then I wouldn't think I was crazy?

He said NO, You stop doing crazy things, then everybody else wouldn't think you are crazy. WHA!! In your case, you just have to learn, to be taught to do other things, and that takes time. Stick with it. As you say, you have nothing better to do, do you?

[HotHoneyVintage]

Tal,

Hey I llike this: 'He said NO, You stop doing crazy things, then everybody else wouldn't think you are crazy.' that made me LOL. How do you know what you want? I don't know nothing that I want really excepts the things I been saying like going on a date and having some man really say he likes me. People keep saying on here its not important but it is.

[talaniman]

Instead of wanting/hoping for some guy to make you happy, or give you some attention, its really simple, love the person you see in the mirror every morning, tell them you love them, smile at them, and promise to be good to them.

If you do this every day, you will be looking to be good to YOURSELf, and make YOURSELF happy, until you have someone to share that happiness with.

That where love, life, and happiness starts with YOU. Through loving yourself, you will always be looking to make yourself happy.

That's the difference between enjoy your time, and having fun exploring the possibilities of your world, and settling for some loser who gives you enough attention to get your nose open. People who love themselves don't settle for just anything that comes along, and they enjoy themselves until the right thing comes around.

That what people mean when they say what others "get" doesn't matter. Because if you love yourself, then its YOUR world that matters.

Now go smile and tell the face in the mirror you love them, and I guarantee, if you smile at them, they will smile back. That's the way to start your day.

[HotHoneyVintage]

OK Tal but I think it all sound like a bunch of a 'new wave' hippy stuff. Also I feels its just a distraction from the real facts of living alone and having nobody but sigh all right if you say so. But I personaly don't see myself ever doing any of that stuff and taking it seriously because if its not really true can't say it.

My therapist she say just tells yourself these thing every day 'even if you don't believe them' and I think what a waste of time lying to yoursels but I don't get that but I just say all right to her.

[talaniman]

LOL, hippies stuff? No way. It's a tried and true exercise in accepting yourself, changing thought patterns, and promoting positive self talk, so you can make changes in the way you cope with your situation.

Sometimes we have to fake it until we make it to get from obsessing on one thing, and letting it give us negative thoughts and reactions, to more positive outlooks to deal with our own feelings about ourselves.

I mean when you stop thinking and acting crazy, you have to replace it with something right? Why not some good orderly direction, and gratitude for an attitude, I mean that's what worked for me, and its no lie, just an attitude adjustment.

You would be surprised what a month or two of loving who you are will do for you. A good positive self image, and trust me, you can deal with any situation life throws at you, and you will know its okay to be alone, and never be lonely.

Its not new wave hippie stuff, nor a lie to yourself. It's a tool to use to cope with the crazy world we live in. And the CRAZY people in it, or we will be as crazy as THEY are. Won't WE?