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godsbabygirl267 · Mar 19, 2009, 09:17 PM

Ok, I definitely know I give advice on this subject all the time, but I would like a clear cut list of things if that's OK.

So, what are some clues that a guy actually likes a girl, as more than a friend?

Again I realize I answer similar questions often, but it's a different thing completely when you're thrown into the situation.

:D

nikosmom · Mar 19, 2009, 09:25 PM

If he likes you as more than a friend, he's going to be clear about that fact because he will want you to himself. He will want to be sure that you know how he's feeling before some other guy comes and snatches you up.

He will be attentive to you and pay attention to your feelings.

He will treat you with respect; never putting you down.

He will not allow anyone else to put you down or mistreat you.

He will invite you into his world (meeting his friends, sharing his activities).

He will work harder at getting into your head and heart rather than getting into your pants.

He will try to build you up so that you can be a better person; bringing out the best in you.

nikosmom · Mar 20, 2009, 04:32 PM

Actually, if you noticed, the things on that list don't require an incredible amount of courage. They're really just kind things to do.

Think about one of your good girlfriends- aren't you nice to her, paying attention if she needs you?
Do you invite her to do things with you? She's probably met some of your family and other friends, right?
Do you like spending time with her, not expecting anything in return?

These are really simple acts of kindness. It comes naturally. :)

jrsg · Mar 20, 2009, 05:02 PM

Well, you'll know if he tries to spend time with you.

That is always the dead giveaway.

If he tries to sit next to you in class, or asks to hang out with you. If he talks to you whenever he gets the chance.

You'll know if he likes you because he will treat you differently than others. Maybe he'll be nicer, more attentive to you than he is with others.

godsbabygirl267 · Mar 20, 2009, 07:56 PM

These are all really good signs you guys. Thanks so much for answering.
~Destiny

------Rugby kicks face-----------------------------

jrsg · Mar 20, 2009, 10:52 PM

So...
Is there someone out there you like? Someone you think likes you?

I mean, c'mon! You can't ask a question like this with no follow up! Give us the details! ;)

godsbabygirl267 · Mar 22, 2009, 11:56 PM

Honestly, If you really want to know. There is a guy in my school that I really like. He is a Junior, and two years older than I. He also plays on the boys Rugby team; I am captain of the girl's team. He is amazingly smart and funny, shy yet somehow also outgoing, he plays guitar very well and can sing, he sings for his church at outings and events. Honestly, the reason he appeals to me is probably that he is different than most of the other guys at school. Sorry for the vulgarity, but for lack of better words, he's not a man-whore. He doesn't seem the type that is just in it for sex. I find him genuinely interested in conversations with me and I care about his well being a lot.

Five of his friends and his sister have told me that he likes me, but I just don't see it. I can't find any dead set give away that screams, "I like you a lot” and that frustrates me more than you could imagine. I want to ask him how he really feels and what he's really thinking, but again, I am a sort of shy person sometimes. I guess I'm afraid he'll completely reject me, or our friendship will become strained and awkward. I just wish it was easier to like someone, without all the drama and theatrics.

nikosmom · Mar 23, 2009, 05:59 AM

It can be hard to put your feelings out there because of the risk of rejection. It seems like things are comfortable right now and he might come around eventually. No need to push it prematurely.

I applaud you for actually having legitimate reasons for liking him. So many teens when asked why they like someone, the first thing they say is, "Because he/she's cute." You have a concrete list of things that are deeper than looks.

That says a lot about you and also says that you've taken the time to get to know this young man. You two already have something in common which is a great start. If five of his friends and his sister have told you he likes you then he probably does.

Tell me, how did you find out all these things about him- did he tell you or did you hear it from someone else? If he shared this much with you I'd say he likes you too because guys don't normally open up to girls they don't like. ;)

jrsg · Mar 23, 2009, 03:51 PM

Yeah, sounds like a good guy, and a promising chance for a good relationship!

You sound very mature :) Looking at MORE than looks. Good for you :)

I wish you all the luck with him!

(And by the way, he probably does like you... 5 friends and his sister tell you? Me think he likes you!)

Alty · Mar 23, 2009, 03:55 PM

It's hard to put yourself out there and risk rejection, but, if you don't try, you won't win.

Why not ask him out on a date? Movies, dinner, a party. Sometimes we gals need to make the first move. :)

I'm so glad I'm out of the dating scene, I don't think I could do it all again, but oh, the memories. :)

Diehardrocks92 · Mar 23, 2009, 05:02 PM

YOUR never gonna be sure every guy is different people can tell you their ideas he might keep looking at you he mite keep talking to you OR he could complete ignore you you'll never know best way to find out is bite the bullet and tell him that you like him the worst thing he can say is no and if your afraid of rejection ask him somewhere no will see and if he says no use your best friend DENIAL i didnt say that to him and in his dreams xx:o:o:o

Alty · Mar 23, 2009, 08:52 PM

Originally Posted by Diehardrocks92

YOUR never gonna be sure every guy is different people can tell you their ideas he might keep looking at you he mite keep talking to you OR he could complete ignore you you'll never know best way to find out is bite the bullet and tell him that you like him the worst thing he can say is no and if your afraid of rejection ask him somewhere no will see and if he says no use your best friend DENIAL i didnt say that to him and in his dreams xx:o:o:o

Please stop with the purple! I've asked you once already. Colors makes your post really hard to read, most people will just pass it by.

Please use black only. Thank you.

godsbabygirl267 · Mar 23, 2009, 09:49 PM

Well, I found out most of what I know of him from just chatting with him about inconsequential things such as would he prefer this or that, or favorite colors and such, usually meaningless topics lead too much deeper subjects when we get to talking. I've never really been the pretty girl, so I guess I've never really paid much attention to the way a guy looks, not to say I don't notice when a guy is a total slob, but I couldn't care less if he's not the hottest guy on the basketball team, aas long as he's genuienly a good person, that's what I base my realizations on.

I've been debating on whether to ask him to come over to my house merely to hang out, watch a movie, play guitar, (more or less him play guitar, and I sit there dumbfounded trying to keep up) dinner maybe. BUt I'm not super outgoing, or confident as I've realized in the past few weeks, so It'll probably take a while for me to work up that kind of courage.