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Did he have full burial arrangements and transportation to US paid for? If not, she is not obligated to comply. If yes, she still is the spouse and has right of disposition so can do what she wants.

Go to your states cemetery & funeral bureau website. Ca dept of consumer affairs site has online pamphlet regarding these issues

And you can't talk to your brother?

You do not have to have a funeral. Your corpse will have to be disposed, either cremation or burial. If you choose cremation, go to a mortuary and arrange and pay for a direct cremation. If you...

He was her husband, he is entitled to her ashes.