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New Member
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:42 AM
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My younger brother is a student. He does not do any job.
My younger brother is a student. He does not do any job. He has a girl friend. Now she is pregnant. My family does not know it. If my mother know it, it will be disaster. My mother is sick. This news is very harmful to her health .What should I do for peace of our family if the girl come to our house with the baby after his/her birth . I am very tensed about this. Please give me a proper suggestion .
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Expert
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Sep 19, 2011, 10:20 AM
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Where are you from, what culture, this makes a difference.
What you do in India may not be the same as what you would do in the UK or in US.
But your younger brother is going to be a father, and your mother is going to be a grandmother.
The girl can expect help with the baby, both physical, help in watching and care for baby, and in money for child support.
Next this is your brothers issue, he needs to find a way to tell your mother, since a new baby in the house is going to be noticed.
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Ultra Member
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Sep 19, 2011, 10:54 AM
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Never heard of the sickness, someone else is having. A baby.
I know it will probable make her upset but there is no medical grounds that would cause her to get sicker.
Stress is not the best I must admit
That's why you guys need to look at this problem in a different way
It's done now.
Your about to have a new life in the family
Remember the baby did not ask to be born so it's completely in this
You both need to not put your own thoughts and feelings aside for this baby
Be the stronger people her and look after and love that baby with all your heart.
And your brother needs to be a man and own up and to his responsablities
It's not all on you and your mom remember that
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Expert
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Sep 19, 2011, 12:59 PM
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Nothing can be done until the expecting father, and mother decide what THEY are going to do. For your part though, stay out of it, until they do decide, but encourage him to come clean, with his family, before even bringing the girl around, or at least talk to his father, or some reasonable experience, respected, male figure. Or YOU talk to a trust older male, and gain proper guidance.
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Emotional Health Expert
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Sep 20, 2011, 05:56 AM
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I presume that your mother knows your brother has a girlfriend, and that he is also living at home? Are you also in the same home as well?
I'm thinking that if that is the case, this girlfriend likely visits with your brother, and that will no doubt make this even more stressful for you, knowing she's pregnant.
Does her family know about the pregnancy? What do you think will happen when they find out, if they don't know already.
If this is a case of everybody knows but your mother, I would be inclined to consider two things. One is having a firm talk with your brother, and telling him that he must man up, and tell his mother what is going on. If he's man enough to produce a baby, he should be man enough to face the consequences. It is terrible to keep his mother in the dark until after the baby is born (if that is what he's planning to do). It won't make it any easier on your mother now, or nine months from now.
You might want to consider seeking the advice of an aunt, or close friend of your mother. This isn't a situation that is going to just disappear- a little advice from another person as to what to do, might help you. Enlist their help in even talking to your brother and his girlfriend.
YOu know your mother better than anybody, and it must be terribly stressful for you to keep this secret from your mother. Especially knowing that it is only a matter of time that she finds out. Have you considered telling her yourself?
While you keep this secret with your brother, you are also in the position of seeing your mother in the dark about what's going on. Not a great position to be in.
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