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    alsa's Avatar
    alsa Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Apr 2, 2009, 08:21 AM
    I will be the eternal love?
    A friend of mine was confused by a boy. Three years ago they met in a disco, and they started to went out together at nights, as good friends, but one day he kissed her. He said her that he didn't want anything special, he wanted let the things go on, and see what happened between them.

    They went out every weekend and they finally end in bed together. Everything it was the same since 2005. Nothing changed.

    Now my friend is a bit tired of this, she really love him, but she wants more. What can she do to make him want more of her?

    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
    Ultra Member

    Apr 2, 2009, 08:30 AM
    You can't make him want more, you can only save yourself at this point. You are in a "friends with benefits" relationship that doesn't have a future. He is getting what he wants without an obligations or commitments to you.

    Stop sleeping with him and the only way this is possible is for you to stop seeing him. You won't maintain a friendship with this person and it is time to break the toxic cycle for yourself.
    BMI's Avatar
    BMI Posts: 892, Reputation: 270
    Senior Member

    Apr 2, 2009, 10:01 AM

    I'm no expert on the subject but I doubt many relationships ending in eternal love began with "we started out sleeping together for 3 years as friends with benefits and..."
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,137, Reputation: 10852

    Apr 2, 2009, 12:30 PM
    This is Alsa's post, this one was cleaned up, and edited, sorry for the inconvenience folks. It would be better if the friend could post for herself, under her name, so we can get her feedback.

    I think your friend is asking for too much from a friends with benefits thing, and if she stops giving it up, he probably will leave.

    For sure, she needs to stop having sex first. Then figure things out from there.

    Who knows, if they talk, maybe he does have feelings, I mean, 3 years is a long time to be together, and not have at least talked, before now.

    I find it hard to believe that after 3 years they haven't discuss where this is going.

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