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    tina2003's Avatar
    tina2003 Posts: 6, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Jan 4, 2011, 09:27 PM
    Why he doesn't want to talk to me?
    I was seeing a guy and he seemed to be respectable and so polite. So I liked him... I asked him if he wanted a short time relation I wouldn't be with him cause I can't trust. He made me feel he also wanted long relation, he told me that I was so sweet - nice - sexy... but after two weeks he started to change and sometimes he was not even kind . All I did love him and respect him... even when he was sick I asked him if he wanted me to take him doctor... he stopped talking to me , texing me I didn't call or text for a day but after that I got worried and I called him , he didn't answer, I text him and told him if he changed his mind it was OK , I deserve to know but he said nothing... today I saw him at my job and he looked at me so cold and kind of mad... I even don't know why. I didn't do anything wrong . I don't know what to do . I truly feel like I am in love with him and he knows it that's why he is like that to me? But why?
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #2

    Jan 4, 2011, 09:44 PM

    One thing I've learned about SOME men, is that talk is cheap. I have men tell me often how sweet, sexy, nice, yada yada yada... "Put your money where your mouth is" is what I say.

    Even if he has said these things to you, it may not matter. It sounds as if he is butt hurt because he didn't get what he wanted. (You in the bedroom) so now he has no use for you.

    Stop trying to pursue and move on. You deserve better. He's a waste of time.
    tina2003's Avatar
    tina2003 Posts: 6, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Jan 4, 2011, 10:16 PM
    Comment on Enigma1999's post
    I feel like he got scared to fall in love with me... cause he told me he was falling in love. I think this is the most disrespect to ignore somebody without any good reason. I try to forget but its really hard cause I already feel that I love him:(
    nids81's Avatar
    nids81 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jan 5, 2011, 07:54 AM
    You know what... be his girlfriend and not his 'Mom'.secondly he may be interested in some one else and wouldn't have found you of his type... the earlier you wake up to the reality and move on.the best is it for you! Tc
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
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    #5

    Jan 5, 2011, 08:09 AM
    You told him you wanted a short term relationship, and that was because you 'can't trust' as you said. So, after two weeks, he realizes that he wants more of a relationship, but you've already made it clear from the beginning that you weren't interested in a long term relationship.

    So, he did the right thing, and moved on.

    If you have now, after two weeks, decided that you think a relationship may work out with him, you should make a move, and clear the air. If he is still interested, you will know. If he isn't, then next time you meet someone, it might be a good idea not to cut them off at the pass before you even get on the horse.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,250, Reputation: 10853
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    #6

    Jan 5, 2011, 04:14 PM

    I asked him if he wanted a short time relation I wouldn't be with him cause I can't trust
    How can you expect someone to want a long term relationship right off th bat of meeting someone? That's so unrealistic, and obviously he changed his mind. Let it go and move on, and that means leaving him alone as he is leaving you alone, a sure sign of go away. He ain't going to give you answers to the obvious.

    I don't think he changed so much as his true character came out and he was a lot different than what he presented himself in the beginning.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #7

    Jan 5, 2011, 05:26 PM
    A lot of back story missing.

    How long together. How old. Previous relationships. etc. "love" can be used by anyone, anytime.

    I can't give you advice w/out more info.

    A person can say what they mean and not do it. A person can lie outright and manipulate.

    Ultimately, any lasting relatipnship demands open communication and a will to work through rough spots. Most relationships hit ruts and walls. Again... more info from you would do wonders.

    I'm not going to brand him one way or another. Yet.

    More info is golden... at least a start, from one perspective.
    tina2003's Avatar
    tina2003 Posts: 6, Reputation: 2
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    #8

    Jan 5, 2011, 09:22 PM
    Comment on kp2171's post
    I was with him just two weeks, he started to get close to me and honestly I thought It was soon (he tried to touch me) but my body was not relax and I was kind of not comfortable. It made him being unkind to me and he changed, aftar that he didn't talk
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #9

    Jan 5, 2011, 10:03 PM
    I'm going to ask this be closed if you don't give detailed info...

    How old is he? How old are you? Any previous relationships? Explain.

    What does he tried totouch you mean? etc.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #10

    Jan 5, 2011, 10:08 PM
    How long have you known him? How long as friends? In classes together? Generally, where are you from?
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #11

    Jan 6, 2011, 09:28 AM

    Tina,

    This may seem harsh but I don't buy it... I just don't buy it.

    I don't believe that he was "falling in love" with you only after two weeks. There is not enough to know about a person in a two week period to call it love.

    I DO believe, however, that he wanted you (lust) in a short two weeks.

    You were uneasy, he knew that, bu bye... Get my point.

    I do agree with the others, we do need more history here, but for some reason, I don't even think your history will even matter for I feel very strongly about what I believe.

    I guess my only real big question is why you only wanted a "short term" relationship. That doesn't say a lot.

    How or why would someone want to put effort in a short term relationship.

    Again, I'm not buying the "in love" not one bit.
    answerme_tender's Avatar
    answerme_tender Posts: 1,148, Reputation: 689
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    #12

    Jan 6, 2011, 09:54 AM

    I agree Enigma---Even I can remember my Mother telling me if some guy starts telling you he "Loves You" after just meeting you, he isn't in love, he is wanting to get into your pants!!

    A man that really wants to get to know you and be with you in a true relationship, doesn't start talking love within couple weeks of knowing you. True love takes time, you need to know each other. Just remember the difference between love and lust.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #13

    Jan 6, 2011, 08:28 PM
    OP'er wanted long term... said he said he "also" wanted long term. She didn't trust that he wanted anything more at first. Its not worded well, but it's there in the OP.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,250, Reputation: 10853
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    #14

    Jan 6, 2011, 08:40 PM

    I asked him if he wanted a short time relation I wouldn't be with him cause I can't trust. he made me feel he also wanted long relation,

    I guess he changed his mind.
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #15

    Jan 6, 2011, 08:41 PM

    Then perhaps you should just go up to him and ask him what happened...

    As far as him saying he "also" wanted long term, where is that statement? I read "he made me feel he also wanted long term."

    So did he say he did or was that just YOUR feeling?

    Still sounds as if he had other motives.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #16

    Jan 6, 2011, 09:08 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Enigma1999 View Post
    Then perhaps you should just go up to him and ask him what happened....

    As far as him saying he "also" wanted long term, where is that statement?? I read "he made me feel he also wanted long term."

    So did he say he did or was that just YOUR feeling?

    Still sounds as if he had other motives.
    I give up.

    I was not trying to say he really wanted long term.

    I don't get where people ask why she asked for short term. Other than poor syntax.

    Done.

    OP'er, you're on your own. More info not given.

    Two weeks and crazy in love is not love. Get control of yourself and stop blaming.

    Unsub'ing.
    Imabadman's Avatar
    Imabadman Posts: 303, Reputation: 135
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    #17

    Jan 7, 2011, 06:44 AM

    I wish to know who deleted my post and why? Has this forum gone to a dictatorship for 2011?
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #18

    Jan 9, 2011, 07:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Imabadman View Post
    I wish to know who deleted my post and why? Has this forum gone to a dictatorship for 2011?
    Didn't read your post... Was it offensive to the OP? Or anyone ese for that matter?

    That could be a reason why. Other then that, I'm not sure.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,250, Reputation: 10853
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    #19

    Jan 9, 2011, 09:26 PM

    I'm sure, personal attacks on anyone are not allowed.
    Imabadman's Avatar
    Imabadman Posts: 303, Reputation: 135
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    #20

    Jan 10, 2011, 07:03 AM

    There was NO personal attack.

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