I had a relationship with a girls that is 4 years older than me..
I'm 20 and she is 24.. before we had a smooth relationship but suddenly after a month she said she does not love me... God,but its only the first of the scene.. after a week or 2 weeks later I think,I met with her and she send me a messages that she still feel love between us...
She has a boyfriend but he live thounsands mile from her,and she told me that they always had a fight in telephone...
After she say she still feel a love between me and her,I couple with her again... but its not the same as the first time..
After two weeks or three weeks if I'm not wrong,she said she wanted to be my friends only... I know I don't spend much time on her,but she going out with another guys that have wife,I truly cannot accept that...
I didn't talk or messages for 1 month and a week... I was so frustrated and I cheated to myself that I hate her even when my heart love her... I scold her 2 times and I did say that I don't ant to be her friend,and I said it would be better if pretend that we don't know each other and she say up to me.. how come I can make like I not know her before,I didn't even say helo or smile when I see her within this 1 month,its really pain cause I was trying to forget her but to see her everday.. its imposible,and its make me more thinking and thinking of her.. and yesterday I message her after long time no contact with her,but I use a new number and she don't know it was me... I ask her if she has a relationship with this guy cause this guys tell that she is his girlfriends... but,this guy already married and her wife is pregnant... she persist that she don't have any relationship with that guy,but after I tell her that it was me.. she said I don't need to busybody about her life,just like the sentences I write to her in Facebook before.. its like she throw the stone back to me,I also write that I wish I don't need to see her face everday cause I hate her in my Facebook wall but I did not mentioned her name.. I just can't keep control myself to keep saying words that will stabbed her heart.. I just realized after I write but its too late cause she had read it before I delete it.. back to last night topic,she said I mind my care my own business and she instead,she also told me she going to stop working and that mean I will never see her again... at last she tell me not to disturb her again...
I said I wait her last night because I want to talk to her,but she did not show up and make me waited for 4 hours start from 2a.m until 6a.m in the morning.. its really killing me for waiting like that,in the meantimes I waited her for 4 hours,I send message by message about how my feelings to her,and I did tell that I'm very2 sorry to treat her like this,I also mentioned when the first time I met her and we two were together until 6a.m and she just didn't show up... now I'm frustrated with my own stupid action,stupid mind that keep saying nonsense,and I really don't know what to do again,but I really really love her very much.. after 1 months I keep saying to myself that I hate her and tell her that I hate her,suddenly I feel like I'm going to lost half of my body when she said that she's going to go after 2 months...

You should have stayed no contact. She doesn't want you.
She has moved on and you should too.

If she's having an affair, that's her business and it doesn't have anything to do with you since you are no longer in her life.

Save yourself a lot of pain and heartache and leave her alone.
Her affair will finally catch up with her and she'll see how it feels.

So,its mean I should forget about her?
I will see her everyday,and what should I do if I see her again?should I smile or make like I have no reaction at all?

Leave her alone! No contact means no texting, facebooking.. calling or talking.

I would love to help you, but your post is too long to read. And the other thread is the same.

Oh man...
I don't know what to say right now,I'm really2 disappointed with myself... guess I just need to move along and forget about her,but I feel my breathe is heavy now... and I feel like my heart has scattered in thousand pieces of broken mirror,just like in the movie... dont know where to start,feel like its hard to catch my breath... anyway,thank you so much...

Shadowburn,thanks very much if you are trying no help me...
But I think there is no hope again..
Kitkat22,shadowburn... do you think I need to send her a farewell messages?

To the Op, please repost after putting your questions into paragraphs that we can understand, we can't help.

Kitkat22...
Maybe what to try to ask me to do is like piercing a knife to my own heart... but if I don't do it,its will slowly through my heart..
So... better I just pierce it quickly right and just eat the pain...
I'll do as you advice... thank you so much..

Your welcome.

Kitkat22...
What does your lines really means
"a coward dies a thousand deaths.A brave man only one"?

Exactly what it says.

But I don't really nderstand the meanings... does it mean if we fall,we should stand and face it instead of running away and doing the same mistake again?

it sucks when sumone you care for uses your feelings against you. I would suggest you move on, and forget about her. She obviously doesn't value you, or your feelings. It will hurt, but moving on is healthier than obsessing over a woman that acts childish.

What it means is this... if you go through life and never live it to it's fullest because you are afraid you will be hurt or you're afraid you might die you live every single minute being a coward. A coward is afraid of losing his life so he never really lives, He dies over and over because of his fear.

A brave man may not like the cards he's been dealt, but he spends every moment of his life knowing how lucky he is to be alive. He doesn't mind being in a job that's dangerous or to take a chance again after failing at one thing or many things. He would gladly lay down his life for his family, his country, his God.


Cowards take the easy way out when life gets to tough. They lose a woman or a job or money and they kill themselves.. thats the easy way out a cowards way out. They don't have the backbone to stay here and live life and try to make it better. The thing is if they take their life over a woman or a man it isn't going to hurt the woman or man... they'll go living and forget all about you.

That's what it means

ar0000:thanks,I feel better now and thanks to kitkat22 that giving me the advice... I know I just torcher myself if I keep thinking of her... now I feel relief,the moment I think of her... I just tell myself that she's not mine anymore,so I don't need to stress myself think about her... thank you very2 much kitkat22...