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    What to say to your ex boyfriend to get him to leave you alone?

    Asked Sep 23, 2011, 04:31 PM 9 Answers
    My ex won't leave me alone, he said if I get a new boyfriend he will kill him and if I talk to another lad on Facebook etc he will inbox them telling them to leave me alone and that his going to hurt him, please help..

    Last edited by JoeCanada76; Sep 23, 2011 at 11:41 PM.
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    9 Answers
    landomando's Avatar
    landomando Posts: 43, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member

    Sep 23, 2011, 06:56 PM
    It means he likes u a lot. Loves you. What did he do to become your ex?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,002, Reputation: 7675

    Sep 23, 2011, 07:08 PM

    It means he is dangerous perhaps, it means you need to report him to the police for making threats on the life of others. It means you should defreind or block him from seeing your Facebook page. Why should he know who you message.

    It means you should stop having any contact at all, don't read his texts, don't read his emails, don't answer his calls
    Helpful (6)
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,692, Reputation: 1547
    Entomology Expert

    Sep 23, 2011, 07:29 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by landomando View Post
    It means he likes u alot. Loves you. What did he do to become your ex?
    It actually means he has issues and is probably obsessed. Loving someone doesn't make it okay to threaten people... that's absurd.

    You should do as Fr_Chuck suggested and stop any kind of communication with him, including blocking him.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 53,311, Reputation: 10828

    Sep 24, 2011, 11:24 AM
    Report this and make parents, friends, and authorities, aware of his threats, and bad behavior. Protect yourself.
    Helpful (1)
    Darkestnights77's Avatar
    Darkestnights77 Posts: 9, Reputation: 3
    New Member

    Sep 24, 2011, 09:23 PM
    Like all the other answers have said, it's best to report him to someone you trust, and if he's intruding in social sites such as Facebook, you should definitely block him, so yah, this guy sounds dangerous :/
    Helpful (2)
    landomando's Avatar
    landomando Posts: 43, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member

    Sep 26, 2011, 09:46 AM
    If you love someone you would not want them to be with another guy. It is what love is maybe a different kind of love where he is more attached but it is love.

    Earlier Reminder:

    Moderators note*** Everyone is entitled to an opinion, but no this is not what it means, Love does not do things like this, Love will not threaten you, love will not scare you.
    This poster has no understanding of issues of danger in a relationship where one person becomes controlling and obsessed.

    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584

    Sep 26, 2011, 11:53 AM
    Death threats, issued against anyone, is a definite red flag. As others have already said, you need to cut him out of your life. Delete and block him from everything online. If he ever knew any of your passwords, or you entered them in front of them or on a computer he had access to, then you need to change them.

    Don't talk to him or answer any of his calls/texts/emails/online messages. If he does leave you a message, or any kind, save it. If possible, file a restraining order against him. Tell your parents and friends what he's saying and doing, and have them help you keep an eye out for him. Also, warn them that he may approach them with lies about you or threatening you and/or them.

    If you do start talking to or dating someone else, warn them about him. Make sure they know you have a vindictive, and possibly dangerous, ex who has made death threats against any future boyfriends.

    Protect yourself. Document EVERYTHING he does (saving all messages he leaves you and writing down any face-to-face encounters). If he does approach you in person, then you should immediately type up everything about the encounter and email it to yourself. It'll ensure you have a record of what happened that he can't claim you made up later. Have your friends and family do the same thing if he approaches or contacts them.

    Death threats are NOT love, of any kind. They are a serious matter and a reason to be extra careful and take extra care to protect yourself and those you care about.

    If at all possible, file a restraining order against him. If that's not possible, then file a complaint against him. Do what you can to have things documented by the police. Even if there's not enough to get a restraining order, it'll show a pattern of behavior and history of violent threats, in the event he does escalate to actual harm. It's better to file complaints over several minor (at least from a legal standpoint) issues and have that history established, than to ignore it and have it escalate to the point where someone is in actual danger and not have the police take it seriously.
    Helpful (3)
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,692, Reputation: 1547
    Entomology Expert

    Sep 26, 2011, 06:58 PM
    I find it amusing that landomando gave my answer a negative rating but didn't bother to give it to anyone else... despite the sorry excuse for a negative, I still stand by what I said. His attempted explanation of what he said still doesn't cut it. Loving someone does not involve threats of violence.
    Helpful (1)
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,668, Reputation: 1707
    Uber Member

    Sep 26, 2011, 07:14 PM
    Restraining order.

    Also keep track write down all the threats. Save all written forms of communication that happens.

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