My boyfriend of almost a year broke up with me. At the time he said he needed a break and could we still be friends. After four days he says he was being selfish and was feeling overwhelmed when he said that, and now he wants to get back together. So I said okay. The problem is that he has done this once before. Both times he broke up with me were because he was having issues with his son. His son is very emotional and angry with everyone. Understandable because his mother has pretty much abandond him and his sister. He has always like me but doesn't want his dad dating... Poor kid needs some counseling... His dad feels guilty and spoils him. The son is turning into a nightmare child and he is only 10. He is a good kid with problems and no coping skills.
Anyway, each time I think that it is a real break up. So I grieve the loss of the relationship. And now he is back? Lol. I don't know how to feel... I feel like my love and feelings are used up. I feel guarded. Will this feeling pass? I don't even want to kiss him anymore... Should I wait for the feelings to return. Do I need a break now? Or do I just end the relationship?

There's a lot going on. Wow. If he doesn't address the issues with his son, not only is he going to have one heck of a time with his son, I don't see him being of any use to you either. Have you addressed him in getting some help for the son? If so what does he say?

The situation as it is now is not fair to you in the least bit.

I think your boyfriend truly loves you, but he also doesn't realize how creating an off-and-on-again relationship is deeply upsetting you. The real reason he is breaking things off is because he has doubts and worries that you will leave him as a cause of his son's behaviour (perhaps he is just trying to beat you to the punch?). Possibly, he is also ashamed about how his son's problems are affecting your relationship. Or perhaps, he is uncertain how to maintain a healthy romantic relationship with you as his partner and a healthy relationship with his son at the same time. I would suggest you give him space to really think things over. If he thinks the dynamic with his son is posing an inconvenience for you in the relationship, then he should be able to discuss this with you, especially if he sees a future with you. You also have to set some boundaries with him and tell him how you need a man who can make up his mind about where your relationship is headed. If not, you will perpetually find yourself in this vicious cycle of not knowing if he truly wants to commit or if he needs to focus on other priorities in his life. Ultimately, I believe children should come before relationships so if you truly love him, let him deal with the emotional turbulence he is experiencing with his son and if your relationship with him is meant to happen it will happen. However, in order for you two to function in a healthy, happy relationship, he needs to work out the problems that persist with his son first!