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madjack7 · Dec 21, 2012, 02:28 PM

Hi there, I'm 17 years old. Would describe myself as sort of a 'jock' and am well over 6 foot, big lad (not fat) and am renowned for being a 'tough guy' and also like to think of myself as quite funny too! So my question there is a girl I like she is also 17. It is almost comical she is very short like 5"1 and relatively quiet, intelligent (not saying I am stupid) but quite popular.I very much like and it pains me to think of a future without her. I consider myself quite shy talking to girls I like. Quite a big problem is the fact she has dated 2 of my friends. First one was about a year long but that must have being about 4 years ago now. They still get on very well and In never truly believe they got over each other. The second one they went out twice, the girl cheated with her first boyfriend though don't get the wrong idea she is definitely not a slut. She had sex about a few times with the 2nd one as well. Also I have quite a close friend who also likes her but has never got anything from her. He has admitted he 'loves' her but I THINK she will only see him as a friend. They are very similar have similar interests and I hate to say it seem perfect for each other. Me and her have always seemed to get on and we very occasionally tease each other, have a laugh.
So basically I guess my question is, is there still hope for me? Or am I fighting a lost cause?

mgall3 · Dec 21, 2012, 07:19 PM

You need to tell her how you feel. Simple as that

madjack7 · Dec 22, 2012, 01:20 PM

Originally Posted by mgall3

you need to tell her how you feel. simple as that

But do I love her or just have some kind of freak obsession with her?

talaniman · Dec 22, 2012, 02:09 PM

Ask for a date and find out.

madjack7 · Dec 22, 2012, 02:50 PM

I could potentially lose 3 very close friends... is that worth it? I don't think so...

talaniman · Dec 24, 2012, 04:02 PM

Then why even wonder what she is up to? It doesn't matter if you have no intention of following up, or doing anything about it, so don't dwell on what ifs, or why's and may indeed not know why she did what she did herself.

Who needs the drama and confusion? Let it go.

But do I love her or just have some kind of freak obsession with her?

Not unusual for an unexpected kiss or make out session to trigger intrique and curiosity. Must have been quite a session. But friends is a powerful enough attraction in itself. Feelings are powerful and hard not to act on, or obsess about. Right or wrong.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 24, 2012, 08:12 PM

AT 17 love and obsession and sexual hormone desire is all the same thing.

You can either say something or not, your choice, if you don't, when you are 50, fat and no longer as good looking, you can sit drinking a beer and wonder what would have happened if I had talked to her.

jazzas · Dec 25, 2012, 05:37 AM

Tut tut, enjoy the ride, go with the flow,something better and taller will come along soon don't stop looking.

madjack7 · Dec 25, 2012, 06:16 PM

Thanks for the input everyone. Does anybody here know what its like to love a girl so much and not get her? Does this pain ever go away? I can't stand it, the thought of not spending the rest of my life with her is killing me, is this normal? And I am going with the old clichie that 'It is a really difficult situation as to why I don't tell her I love her... '

megganpitts · Dec 25, 2012, 06:52 PM

Lison I'm a girl. We love it when you are romantic find something she really like and when you tell her give her something you know means alote to her. Like when my boy friend asked me out he know I love wolves case I don't know I just do. To he carved me out a wolf and made it intoa neckless. It meant alote to me and from that day on he knew I loved him. Try that

megganpitts · Dec 25, 2012, 06:55 PM

Originally Posted by madjack7

Thanks for the input everyone. Does anybody here know what its like to love a girl so much and not get her? Does this pain ever go away? I can't stand it, the thought of not spending the rest of my life with her is killing me, is this normal? And I am going with the old clichie that 'It is a really difficult situation as to why I don't tell her I love her....'

it will go away I went throw the same thing with my X-boyfriend ( fyi I'm a girl). I thought I loved him and when I found he cheated I was killed inside. I thought I would never find another person I would love. But I did now I date him and we have been dateing for two year and I'm am happier now then what I ever was

madjack7 · Dec 26, 2012, 05:17 PM

Ok so I am getting the general feeling that I should just leave her which frankly I am not sorry about. On New Year's Eve I am going to this party where there is this quite attractive girl and I think she might like me. Do you think I should do anything with her, would it help me to get over the previous girl? Thanks

talaniman · Dec 26, 2012, 05:37 PM

Why can't you just party instead of looking for a replacement girl friend? Have you forgotten what a good time is?

mystific · Dec 26, 2012, 11:54 PM

Your 'pain' as you put it is of your own doing.

I could potentially lose 3 very close friends... is that worth it? I don't think so...

Your putting your friends above what you feel without allowing yourself or giving yourself the opportunity to find out.

Reality is, if they are indeed 'close friends' no matter what you do.. they should and will understand and stand by you.

Ok so I am getting the general feeling that I should just leave her which frankly I am not sorry about. On New Year's Eve I am going to this party where there is this quite attractive girl and I think she might like me. Do you think I should do anything with her, would it help me to get over the previous girl?

So fickle in thought and in mind. Don't obsess with one girl if the opportunity you think may arise with another... either way I doubt you'll be able to talk to this one either.. good chance she probably likes a friend of yours, been out with one of your friends or knows a friend that knows one of your friends who knows someone else that'll put you in a tail spin.

Enjoy life as it happens.. don't wait for life to create opportunity.. go and make your own.

madjack7 · Dec 27, 2012, 04:51 PM

Yeah OK well then I will just let her go and hope the feeling goes away and I can move on with my life.

Originally Posted by megganpitts

it will go away i went throw the same thing with my X-boyfriend ( fyi im a girl). i thought i loved him and when i found he cheated i was killed inside. i thought i would never find another person i would love. but i did now i date him and we have been dateing for two year and im am happier now then what i ever was

She has never being able to cheat on me so that means the feelings might not go away. Also there is a girl I used to like in a similar way and now I just seem to really dislike them for no reason. Can you explain this?

madjack7 · Jan 4, 2013, 11:52 AM

Hi, well last week at a party I told this girl that I liked her... I don't think she said anything but she quickly went and said I need to my and find (won't say name) but her best female friend. Half an hour later I walked past her friend and she said 'is is true you... ' I didn't let her finish I just walked right past her. Why did she walk off as soon as I told her? Is she not interested? Thanks

Enigma1999 · Jan 4, 2013, 12:55 PM

Wait, what did her friend start to say to you?

Also, why didn't you let her friend say what she had to say? In other words... why did yoy walk away frim her friend in mid sentence?

To be quite honest, if you are interested in this girl, then disrespecting her best friend is not going to earn you any brownie points.

Homegirl 50 · Jan 4, 2013, 02:08 PM

Why did you walk off. Are you not interested?

madjack7 · Jan 4, 2013, 06:37 PM

Wait, I didn't walk away because I wasn't interested. I walked away because I was frustrated at how the conversation had gone. No I didn't disrespect her, definitely we get along all the time and have since had lively talks with each other! :) Also, the best friend did say to the girl I like 'text me about that thing last night' So the girls have clearly talked about it. And the fact that she hasn't said anything I can kind of assume she is not interested? We even got to talk to each other for about 5 minutes and she said nothing... I guess I was just too scared to bring it up again after last time...

Homegirl 50 · Jan 4, 2013, 06:39 PM

Then she is probably not interested.