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Tyne26 · Apr 23, 2007, 07:39 AM

Is this the best way to treat a girl??

The girl I was last with liked a challenge, i.e. bad boy. I WAS LABELLED TOO NICE.

How do guys go about doing this, obviously you don't be nasty to them but this seems to be the best way to keep them interestd,

Capuchin · Apr 23, 2007, 07:40 AM

I am a great believer in being who you are. If the girl doesn't like you because you are too nice, then she wasn't the right girl for you. Find someone who does like nice guys.. Find someone who likes you for who you are, for your quirks.

ForeverZero · Apr 23, 2007, 07:43 AM

First thing you need to understand is that there's a difference between being nice and being spineless. If you don't stand up for yourself and let women do what they want despite your wishes, you're just spineless, not too nice.

Other than that, there's no generic way to treat women. We've all seen the girl who loves nothing more than to be degraded and abused, and we've all seen the girl that being a whiny little emo dolphin loving cupcakes and dandilion person is the key to her heart. Sorry for the generic fortune cookie advice, but for the most part, relationships are about being who you're comfortable being, not who you think somebody else wants.

Capuchin · Apr 23, 2007, 07:44 AM

Forever your point about spinelessness is very important and I neglected to mention it!

Good point!

Tyne26 · Apr 23, 2007, 08:05 AM

Originally Posted by ForeverZero

First thing you need to understand is that there's a difference between being nice and being spineless. If you don't stand up for yourself and let women do what they want despite your wishes, you're just spineless, not too nice.

Other than that, there's no generic way to treat women. We've all seen the girl who loves nothing more than to be degraded and abused, and we've all seen the girl that being a whiny little emo dolphin loving cupcakes and dandilion person is the key to her heart. Sorry for the generic fortune cookie advice, but for the most part, relationships are about being who you're comfortable being, not who you think somebody else wants.

I felt I was too available with the last one as I really liked her, whereas before I haven't been and they did the chasing. She liked a challenge and for some reason I didn't do that. Totally kicking myself for acting too interested

Ash123 · Apr 23, 2007, 08:19 AM

how to keep a girl:

1) be yourself
2) if you are being too needy - fight it - that is not you
3) have a life. And welcome them to join it if they wish.
4) if they run off, let them run... they'll come back if you do NOTHING
5) give 'em the best sex of their life and if you are not sure how... learn
What they like
6) be nice when they deserve it. And make them laugh.
(it's always good to share a laugh).
7) be tough when they deserve it.
8) don't try to impress them by being someone you are not
9) show them/teach them/share with them things they have never seen before
10) get a chain and a lock

murker1 · Feb 2, 2009, 04:40 PM

Originally Posted by Capuchin

I am a great believer in being who you are. If the girl doesnt like you because you are too nice, then she wasnt the right girl for you. Find someone who does like nice guys.. Find someone who likes you for who you are, for your quirks.

Yea what your saying is true, however it is extremely hard to get over a girl that you have fallen for, so just saying that she's not right for you and getting over her is easier said then done.. if you truly love someone you would be prepared to change yourself, sad but seems true.

talaniman · Feb 2, 2009, 04:56 PM

yea what your saying is true, however it is extremely hard to get over a girl that you have fallen for, so just saying that she's not right for you and getting over her is easier said then done..

That's doesn't mean you shouldn't do it because its hard.

if you truly love Someone you would be prepared to change yourself, sad but seems true.

I see the problem, you have to love yourself, and be happy with who you are, to share with a partner, not change who you are.

Delow84 · Feb 2, 2009, 08:22 PM

Wow such an interesting question my first time back to the boards, and relevant.

^_^ I am also a firm believer in being who you are, if a girl doesn't like it, oh well. I use to think being a jerk or what not was the way to go, but way to against my nature. So I ended up with several REALLY good friends off the opposite sex, rather then more.

But just recently, being exactly the same person I have always been, another girl has popped up who really likes me. I am acting the same way, yet to her I'm acting different then how my other friends might describe me.

Not every girl thinks the same, just got to find the ones who see you the way you see yourself. ^_^ The other ones either aren't worth it, or make really good friends ha.

My 2 cents

friend4u178 · Feb 2, 2009, 08:27 PM

Nice to see you back Delow :)

Delow84 · Feb 2, 2009, 08:31 PM

Glad to be back ^_^ I always checked the site every once in awhile. Without it, shoot, I would have been an even bigger mess last year.

But now I think my emotional rollercoaster is out of the tunnel and becoming a fun ride ^_^.

Saw this post and it hit so close to what's going on with me right now, I had to reply.

starbuck8 · Feb 2, 2009, 08:41 PM

Originally Posted by Tyne26

I felt i was too available with the last one as i really liked her, whereas b4 i havent been and they did the chasing. She liked a challenge and for some reason i didnt do that. Totally kicking myself for acting too interested

Everyone likes a challenge. No one wants someone who clings. You need to leave some mystery, and you need to accept yourself for the way you are, and then work on that! You don't need to be the "bad boy" to get the girl. Just be yourself, but be creative in doing it! But, whatever you do, don't fall for the "Drama," and don't play games!

wolfgangqpublic · Feb 2, 2009, 08:41 PM

^^^For all those who think it'll never get better, here's some living proof for you all, in case you thought some of the regulars were just lying to you.