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monstar · Jan 7, 2009, 10:18 AM

Hey Guys -

So here's the problem. There's a friend I have who I really like. We've been friends for about 4 months now but she's amazing and I get the feeling that she's into me too. The only problem is we work at the same office and I don't think either really wants a relationship right now / wants to make the awkward first move.

Anyway, I hang out with her a lot and she's probably my closest girl friend here but I recently met and went on a couple dates with a different girl. It came up in our conversation the other day and she seemed a little overly curious about it. I was wondering though: a) is it a good idea to talk about other girls with a friend who I really hope to be with (or at least tell her how I feel) one day? b) I could really use her advice on things like this but I don't know if its right or if I'm shooting myself in the foot here or what.

Any advice on what I should do would be really appreciated. Thanks so much guys,

Mike

a la king · Jan 7, 2009, 10:23 AM

Tough call..

To play it safe I would:

a)tell the girl at your office how you feel if you think there's a shot. Be warned though.. if it's not somewhat mutual your friendship could be strained for a while or permanently.
b)find someone else to ask. If the girl at your office does like you telling her about the other girl could make her weird.

Separation of interests!

ConfusedAgain · Jan 7, 2009, 10:27 AM

I would say it's safe to mention, but appear confident and leave details out that would put her off, Or add doubt. If she is interested and thinks she has a chance she'll snap it up.

Or if you're interested in her, Just stop dating other girls and Ask her out to dinner.

Whatever you do, don't go on about how nice these other girls are.

Romefalls19 · Jan 7, 2009, 11:11 AM

Ask your office mate out for coffee, tell her how you feel and if she feels the same type of vibe between you two.

starbuck8 · Jan 7, 2009, 11:12 AM

I don't think you should give her too many details about other dates if you're interested in her. If you do decide to tell her how you feel, remember you work together! If you did start dating, that could really interfere with your work, and if something was to go wrong and she doesn't have the same feelings, or if she did and you broke up, that will be a very uncomfortable situation. It would likely be very hard to work in the same office if you were on bad terms. So that is just something you might want to consider ahead of time, to help you make your decision.

talaniman · Jan 7, 2009, 01:57 PM

Never ever discuss females with another female, you may ask out later. Are you crazy?

monstar · Jan 7, 2009, 02:00 PM

Haha I think this was one of those 'I realized the answer after I posted it' type of things. Thanks for your help guys, I really must have been crazy.

ylaira · Jan 7, 2009, 07:42 PM

If she asks say "She's is nice but I like someone else. I'm just not certain if this girl likes me. She's is just here (then look around and wink)" Check her reaction

starbuck8 · Jan 7, 2009, 08:03 PM

Originally Posted by monstar

Haha I think this was one of those 'I realized the answer after I posted it' type of things. Thanks for your help guys, I really must have been crazy.

Hey, we've all had one of "those moments!" Play it cool and hey, maybe she will ask you! Don't jump in too fast, because as I mentioned above, office relationships can cause a lot of problems if they go wrong.

Good luck, and give us an update! :)

talaniman · Jan 8, 2009, 09:33 AM

Talaniman rule- Never discuss personal business with someone you may like but don't know. Thats what we have best friends for.