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    Nevaeh26's Avatar
    Nevaeh26 Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 13, 2008, 02:45 AM
    Stay with long time boyfriend or try something new?
    All right well I don't really know how to start but Me and my boyfriend, the father of my almost 3 year old daughter, have been together for almost 5 years and latley things are gettting bad. We got engaged in Dec. of 2005 and I broke it off in April 2007, But we stayed together, but latley we contiunusly fight and argue sometimes it get phyical, but that's not what bothers me I can stick up for myself but what really gets to me is when he calls me names and screams at me in public, he is always thinking that I am cheating on him, he goes threw my phone, emails, mail and anything else he can get his hands on, I feel like I am a child, he tries to tell me what I can do and who I can talk to to and go out with. If I have talked to a friend he questions me about it all night and fights about it calling them names and sometimes callig them and yelling at them. He goes to work most of the time late or he comes home early and then yells at me for telling him he need to stay at work for his paycheck, he tells me that I am ac ting like his mom but I wouldn't have to if he would just grow up and act like a man. When he is home he doesn't wan to do anything but fight with me. I am not very happy in this relationship anymore and feel trapped, although I make more them him and could provide for myself I am still confussed for about what I should do.
    Then the other day I met this great guy that is atractive and actully made me smile, for once! I have seen him several times since then and we have a lot in common and make great convorsation. He had asked me to go out with him on Monday the 17, however I am not sure if I should, Even though it would just be as friends, if my current boyfriend would find out he would flip and I am unsure of what he is really cablable of. On one hand I feel that I should just cut all ties (except for what has to do with my daughter) with my current boyfriend and try to move on with my life and try to be happy, I know I could be, but on the other hand I would like to stay with him and hope that he gets help with his issues and somehow fix our relationship, however I don't know how long that will take or if it will ever happen, and I am sick and tired of living like this I am young and have plenty of time to have a nice happy life, not to mention although we do not fight in the presents of our daughter I know that she can sense the tention in the home. And I feel that it is very unhealthy for her to be around. Please help me what should I do? Is there anything wrong with me going out with this other guy? Please help:) Thanks for your time!
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #2

    Nov 13, 2008, 03:01 AM

    Neveah,
    The physical thing.. BAD no matter what, first of all it says a lot about you, him and your relationship.
    I think you know that this relationship has run its course, you know you shouldn't go out with this new guy but also I don't think you'd want to if your relationship was good.

    I don't know if this is helpful, but I hope so!
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #3

    Nov 13, 2008, 06:24 AM

    Have you tried to talk things out with him? Or seek possibly counseling? It would be a shame to call it quits when there is a child involved without trying all options.
    slapshot_oi's Avatar
    slapshot_oi Posts: 1,537, Reputation: 589
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    #4

    Nov 13, 2008, 12:49 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Nevaeh26 View Post
    Is there anything wrong with me going out with this other guy? Please help:) Thanks for your time!
    You answered your own question:
    Quote Originally Posted by Nevaeh26 View Post
    if my current boyfriend would find out he would flip and I am unsure of what he is really cablable of.
    You're boyfriend's a nutjob, and it sounds like you were implying that he'd take his anger to a physical level. It's a pretty selfish idea to stick a nice guy in a situation that you know will turn sour just because he put a smile on your face.

    Do it the right way, break it off with your current boyfriend because it's been headed that way for a while now, take some time alone for yourself (months), and if that guy is still around, then go out with him. Until then, he's just dead-meat in your boyfriend's eyes.
    Boristheblade's Avatar
    Boristheblade Posts: 141, Reputation: 17
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Nov 13, 2008, 02:30 PM

    This sounds like failing, and also quite self destructive relationship. For the sake of you and your child I would call it off, pursue this other man when all ties are broken with your current boyfriend and you have your own place or things could spiral out of control.

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