[helliin]

Okay so I've been seeing this guy for over 4 months now and originally he was supposed to be my rebound but it just never ended. I got out of a serious relationship about 5 months ago and he about 8 months ago and well we've talked that neither one wants to get into a serious relationship but our thing isn't just sex.

We bought each other Christmas presents and birthday presents, he met my parents (I haven't met his because they live 6 hours away), I'm meeting his friends next week, I have a toothbrush at his place etc. We also talk about everything and go on 'dates' too and we don't even always have sex when we meet. We text every day and call each other, we've both admitted we have feelings for each other and we're not allowed to have sex with other people, YET we are not dating.

I don't know if I wanted a super serious relationship and we both seem very scared of a relationship but that's what it feels like. He's 2 years older than me (I'm 19, he's 21) and he's applying for this school and all he can do is study. I just don't know what to think of this all, does it seem like this is becoming a relationship or not?

[talaniman]

Naw, just friends with benefits, nice, safe, comfortable rebound agreed on exclusive arrangement. Enough lust to keep the feelings stirred, and at least one of you confused about titles, but cool for you both(?).

It think instead of trying to call it something or other, enjoy it while it last and keep it simple. When you start seeing beyond it you make things so complicated so see what happens, as a few months is such a short time.

Bet you are wondering how to describe it to friends, AND where you stand AND what he feels about the whole thing (And maybe hoping for more?). Scared to akhim? You seem to get along great at this point, and make agreements you can both keep, and work for you both.

I think eventually you will discuss it further and deeper. Couples define what they do together, but it's easy to be afraid to rock the boat. Remember you both are rebounders so keep it slow, and real for now. What's the hurry if it's going good?

[catonsville]

It sounds good for now. You said he is going to further his education, will this require you to be apart? Something to think about. Is it a relationship time will tell. You guys are very young and you are not sure right now that you want a super serious relationship so take it slow and be careful.

[Fr_Chuck]

What you do, does not make it more, how each feels about the other changes it.