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    jb1786's Avatar
    jb1786 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 28, 2012, 10:14 AM
    How to break up a 5 year relationship?
    I've been in a relationship for over five years now. We met in college, and after that for the first couple years it was a long distance relationship. We saw each other on weekends, and whenever we could.

    Things were good. We got engaged on our third year anniversary. It may have been a little impulsive on my part, but at that point in our relationship, I was truly in love and thought I could spend my life with her. In our third year she moved in with me in and my parents in my home town.

    Things changed, our relationship suffered due to our living situation. In our fourth year we bought a house together, optimistically I thought things would change for the better. It’s been a year a half later, and things haven't really changed, we fight and argue a lot, most of the time it’s about money. Other times it’s about small things that get blown way out of proportion for some reason.

    Anyway a couple weeks ago we finally had a conversation about our relationship. We both admitted our faults and agreed to try and change. However for the last couple weeks, I still can’t help but feel like things haven’t changed and feel like the relationship may be coming to an end and for some reason I don’t feel any remorse or sadness. Is this normal? Or do I just not have a heart?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Oct 28, 2012, 10:28 AM
    I think your long situation has been insulated from real living together first by school, distance and being with your parents and despite the 5 years you are at the beginning of learning how to work together.

    You may be a bit numb now but keep working and make no rash decisions or impulsive radical actions. Keep working and talking.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #3

    Oct 28, 2012, 10:33 AM
    How about giving couples counseling a try?
    pepper81's Avatar
    pepper81 Posts: 22, Reputation: 4
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    #4

    Oct 29, 2012, 05:51 AM
    It means the relationship is over and you have accepted it. Next time get married instead of moving in together. It was not respectful of your parents to move her into their home. Never purchase a home with a woman not your legal wife. Move on find your wife and do it right next time.

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