[manman55]

Hi

Im a 25 year old guy. And I've just started seeing an amazing 21 year old girl. From the word go we hit it off. We are very compatible and I love her very much despite only being together for 8 weeks or so. She's beautiful smart funny and we have an amazing sex life. I'm not inexperienced, I've had plenty of relationships. Long and short. But I find myself being insecure and clingy and I'm a worried its going to mess things up!

When we first got together she told me she loved me after 3 days. Few days later came a suggestion to get a place and marriage conversations quickly followed. I wasn't put off at all. I loved the fact we wer both on the same page and wanted the same things. After 4 amazing weeks she went on holidays with her ex. It was all pre planned, they'd booked it before they broke up. She was too subborn to give her ticket up and he was hoppin to get back together. All fairness to her from day one she told me about this holiday and didn't hide anything about it. So she went on the holiday and I despite usually being very laid back I found myself freaking out! It was 2 weeks of hell. No matter how often I seen my friends or did something to take my mind off it I couldn't stop thinking about everything that might happen. I felt I was going crazy. We didn't talk much while she was away .and she told me it was because I was too needy and that she didn't need that stress while she was on holidays.

She got back a few days ago and we had a nice weekend together. I can't help at feel that she hasn't come fully home to me. That there's a part of her that no longer wants to be with me. I've made a point of not texting her until she texts me first. I want to give her the space she needs because I know she's probibly got a lot to deal with. I know she's having 2nd thoughts about us and I know its because of the way I acted while she was away.

The best my head can come up with is to not contact her until she contacts me first... but its drving me crazy I just want my girlfriend back. What do I do?

[joypulv]

I don't see an easy answer, because I would have freaked too! I just don't buy this idea of going off for 2 whole weeks with an ex because it was planned before. Surely someone else could have taken her place (or you could have bought him out, etc). So... it's not your fault as I see it, not that most of what fails in relationships is ever clearly defined as fault. I would let all the hurt hang out, and take the consequences, even if it means breaking up. Otherwise you may be in a slowly deteriorating situation anyway.