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    Elizabeth1314's Avatar
    Elizabeth1314 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 24, 2012, 07:28 PM
    Please I need advice!!
    My ex and I were together for almost 3 years. We have a child together. I moved out with our daughter because I thought he didn't love or want me anymore. He still loved me and wanted me but he thought I didn't want him either. I called him 2 weeks after I moved out and told him I still loved him and wanted to work things out. He said that when he comes home now he is happy. Then he came over to my house and tried to hug and kiss me and told me he loved me. I thought he felt sorry for me because I had just had miscarried our second child. So I didn't respond to him.

    After a few months I was about to tell him again that I am still in love with him and wanted to work it out, before I got the chance, he told me he has a girlfriend and it is "recent and serious". I told him I am still in love with him, he said he didn't know and that the timing is bad. I said it doesn't matter, the history we have doesn't just go away. He agreed. Last week we had a long conversation and we both cried. I think he is still in love with me. I think he is torn because he is in a "serious" relationship. He said he wants to see where this new relationship goes.

    His girlfriend has a big jealously problem with he and I spending anytime together, which is going to happen because we have a child together. I love him and I don't want to move on. I would like some insight into what he may be thinking. Our love is much stronger than the girl he "likes very much" but I don't understand why he hasn't dropped her and come back to me. He knows now exactly how I feel.

    Should I give him more time, and if so how much. He takes a long time to process simple things and this is very complicated. Also we have been separated just over 6 months. He has been with this girl for about a month or so from what I can tell. Please I need advise. I am going out of my mind. Why won't he choose me?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Apr 24, 2012, 10:44 PM
    I am so sorry for your loss, but as sad as it is I think you need a serious healing where you are not trying to get him back. He seems to be just visiting his child I think and the problem is you won't let go.

    You may have history and a child together, but I think he has had enough time to come back if he wanted to, yet has not. So you let him go and let him be a good dad, and stop this waiting and hoping. Its time to regroup and heal and face reality with a healthy mind and out look, and leave the past behind.

    Let him go be happy, while you find happiness without him. It can be done, you can do this.
    none12345's Avatar
    none12345 Posts: 1,439, Reputation: 234
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    #3

    Apr 24, 2012, 11:36 PM
    If he truly loved you, he would not have a girlfriend.
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #4

    Apr 26, 2012, 11:37 AM
    He told you why he is not choosing you, the timing is bad.

    You need to respect him and his relationship, he knows your intentions, the only thing you can do now is hope for him to pick you.

    Also, the past doesn't mean anything, it is just that... the past.

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