[Inhoc73]

I'll try to keep this short. I dated this girl for almost 5 years. She was really into me and was a good girlfriend most of the time, we had small fights here and there but nothing out of the ordinary. We dated the entire time I was in college and I'll admit I wasn't always the best boyfriend, I didn't put her first all the time when she put me first, she found some bad texts in my phone and made out with another girl at one point when we were on a break.

I honestly wasn't sure what I wanted at that point in my life. So there were some major trust issues to say the least, then later on I found some bad texts in her phone and everything kind of spiraled down hill from there. Her actions were more than likely a result of my actions. At any rate I ended up breaking up with her roughly 7 months ago because I found texts to a guy she worked with that I wasn't very happy about, after her repeatedly telling me they were just friends.

Well a while after we broke up she dated him and he ended up cheating on her, karma? But right after we broke up I tried my hardest to get her back to no avail, she wasn't having it. So we both went our separate ways and dated other people. We are back talking and hanging out regularly after 7 months but as hard as I try she won't date me. She says she doesn't know what she wants. I know after being apart from her for so long that she is what I want and I have changed my ways from the past because of what happened.

So what do I do? No other girls I've dated compares to this girl and she's always on my mind, its exhausting trying so hard for her and not getting anywhere. Any help would be greatly appriciated

[talaniman]

Stop trying to get her back as your girlfriend and build a life that you enjoy, with friends, family, and activities that make you happy.

At least give the poor girl plenty of time and space to get her own head together. She may NOT know what she wants, but she knows what she doesn't want, a relationship.

After two bad relationship experiences (doesn't matter who did what, or why), she needs a break from romance. So stop being so selfish about what YOU want.

[batgurl066]

If you really love her and want her then go for it, but there's many girls in this world .

[indya]

Since you've had her around for 5 years, I feel that it's the habit of having her around that makes you want her back more than the 'love' part.

But then again I may be completely wrong.

What I do know is, this girl is completely out of this relationship, and she doesn't want to go back into it, forcing her into it will only harm your future chances with her if you have any.

Any relationship built(or in this case built again) from the emotional debris of a broken person will not last long.

All you can do right now is value her, respect her and let her be the way she wants to be.