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Nova23 · Oct 3, 2011, 08:12 AM

I have asked questions on here have not really gone into detail I will try and explain my situation as best as possible.

I met my ex girlfriend back in 2005 we dated for 9 months she was head over heals in love with me. I was 22 at the time still in college involved in a Fraternity and not the most mature person. I ended up breaking up with her because I guess I did not want a relationship I wanted to be free and enjoy myself. After we broke up we never really stopped talking we hung out and talked all the time like we were still together. She stuck around for over 2 years waiting and hoping for me to come around. Eventually after a while I realized it was time to grow up I started to mature and I did want to get back with her.

The tables now had turned on me and she was tired of waiting. I have been trying ever since to get back with her have showed her in every which way that I have changed and matured and want a serious relationship and am not the person I once was. We both at one point went and were seeing other people nothing serious. I talk with her sister a lot about the situation and she told me that she couldn't get serious with anyone else cause she still loved n cared about me. She has told me recently that she knows she needs to give this a second chance eventually in order to see if were meant to be.

She has been coming to every wedding I invite her to. I am certain this is the girl I want to be with and eventually marry we joke around about wedding rings and what not. We talk when we talk and hangout when we hangout. Its been a long up and down journey and yes I know some will say I'm an idiot for waiting around and should have walked away a long time ago and given up. I am the type of person unfortunately that would rather ride something out till the end and be told I told you so than walk away now and have regrets.

The girl has been a part of my life for 6 years I've been through everything with her good bad n recently her dad passing back in may which has not helped this situation. Her sisters advice to me recently is don't text her don't call her let her be the one to text call you first but that's not me. I like seeing her n talking but sometimes space does very good and helps a situation.

I'm sure most of you think I'm nuts and a part of me is that I am keeping hope through all of this and a part of me feels if we were meant to be with other people we would have been with them by now. Through all of this I have gone out and tried meeting other people tried dating sites got introduced to new people through friends. I have put my full heart towards a few other girls that I had felt something for and nothing ever worked out and I may be crazy for thinking cause I'm suppose to end up with my ex. I couldn't picture at this point in my life being with someone else or starting over with someone else.

I am 28 going on 29 I am not saying I want to get married anytime soon but I do want to settle down. I hope I could get some good advice from some people who have been through similar situations. Does absence really make the heart grow fonder?

Should I take her sisters advise and only text/call her if she reaches out to me first? Any advice would help Thank You

talaniman · Oct 3, 2011, 03:18 PM

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...on-462577.html

Well guy, you have been doing this dance for the last two years and you are no closer than you were before, worse, since you seem to be in the limbo of the friends zone. I would leave her alone and let her have the space she wants and have a life of my own without her.

You will never move on without building a life that doesn't include her, and the last two years should have shown you that. But NO, every time you try a life, if it doesn't end up where you want it, you go back, instead of forward. Your are so stuck, but if you won't take the advice we have given here, then at least do as her sister says,

Her sisters advice to me recently is don't text her don't call her let her be the one to text call you first but that's not me.

Or ,My advice, tell her you have had enough of piddle didly false hope, and she either commit, or set you free!

If she doesn't, set yourself free by stopping ALL contact, and getting a life without her. Or, waste 6 MORE years on this BS!!

kinshu123 · Oct 4, 2011, 03:35 AM

I don't have a lot of experience in this nova,but I hope I can help you out all the same.I think you sincerely love him and it's a pity if she doesn't see it.and I don't think that absence makes the heart grow fonder.contact does.so don't listen to her sister,and be in touch with her with out being too clingy.dont constantly pressuraize her for commitment but rather just flirt around A BIT in a light hearted way.show her that she's your princess and that you truly deserve her,with being too pressurizing.get friendly with her family and close friends.if she knows what's good for her,she will eventually run back into your arms :)