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    catalinahere's Avatar
    catalinahere Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 22, 2011, 12:04 AM
    Should I contact him?
    Two years ago, my boyfriend of three years left me by email. We had a long distance relationship most of the time, since both of us worked in the humanitarian field and had missions in different countries. The three years were difficult, he was older than me and never married, and very much use to his independence. Anyway, the relationship lasted for three years and even though we broke up like two times in between, he always came back and talked about having a family and to settle down. After our last encounter, we agreed to move in together and start a family. Suddenly he sent me an e-mail and told me that I was too demanding. I did not understand why he thought that? He contacted me one more time three months after he left me. I did not reply because I really wanted to close this chapter of my life. I have not contacted him for two years, but I also have not been able to forget him. I am thinking of contacting him to find out what is happening in his life, but I am not very sure if I should do it or not. Please advise me.
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #2

    Sep 22, 2011, 01:50 AM
    The answer is no. Do not contact him. Long distance relationships for so long does not usually work out. It does not sound like it was a good idea to continue. After two years of no contact you still think that there is a chance? After two years of moving on, you want to get in touch with somebody that was not really that close to you?

    So do yourself a favor and avoid the heartache. Move on, Move forward and start a new chapter without the fantasy of wanting to be with somebody that would never be there.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Sep 22, 2011, 09:53 AM
    You say that you haven't forgotten him in two years, so what have you been doing in those years? Are you happy with the social life you have? Have you not built a happy life without him?

    Has something happened to trigger those old feelings for someone you haven't seen in two years?

    I think you have to have a better reason to dredge someone up than curiosity, and old feelings when you consider he dumped you unceremoniously yeas ago, and has made no effort to rectify, or continue communications.

    I wouldn't even consider contacting him.
    catalinahere's Avatar
    catalinahere Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 22, 2011, 12:45 PM
    Thanks to both of you for your helpful responses. In fact there is an important occasion coming and the plans we made just came back to my mind recently. Regarding my social life, it is kind of limited, since I worked in a remote area in a villa in Africa. Anyway, thanks to both of you for bringing back to me the common sense that it seems I am losing for moments. JoeCanada, you were right, he never was there and he never will be.

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