Check out some similar questions!

unnameduser15 · Mar 16, 2011, 09:57 AM

So my girlfriend and I had a ski trip planned for about 1 and a half months. 1 week before the trip we got in a silly argument over nothing and she got pissed and said she wanted to see her sister 6 hours away instead. Now I was a little POed at first as I had made plans but I wanted to avoid even more unnecessary fighting and just shut up (I'm kind of a *****). So last second instead of going to see her sister she decides to go see friends 4 hours away...

I'm pissed... This is a consistent line of behavior that always puts her first and me last. Plans always revolve around what she wants to do and I feel like my feelings are not even looked at.

When I do express that something she has said upsets me I get a scripted "your overly emotional" "grow up" "it's not a big deal". Instant invalidation of my feelings...

What I'm getting at is Q: do you think I'm being "overly emotional" for getting upset about being ditched last second for people she has never even talked to me about?

amicon · Mar 16, 2011, 10:12 AM

Who started the argument?

southamerica · Mar 16, 2011, 10:12 AM

Maybe you ARE sensitive or a little more emotional than she expects you to be, but I don't think you're over-reacting. I would be upset as well if my boyfriend ditched out on exciting plans like that-especially plans that require months of advanced planning and financing.

I think you and your girlfriend aren't as compatible as you would like to be. She seems to be a lot more laid back and emotionally unavailable than you are. If these types of things are always happening, maybe it's time to re-evaluate the state of the relationship.

If she is constantly putting herself and her needs before yours, maybe she's a little too selfish at this point and not ready to be in a commitment. She SHOULD care about how her actions and words make you feel and if she refuses, I say cut your losses and move on.

I hope you find what you are looking for! Good Luck!

talaniman · Mar 16, 2011, 03:46 PM

I was going to blame her for being selfish, and uncaring, but that would not be completely true, since you are still there, and nothing has changed.

You are half responsible for this relationship, so you are letting her be selfish, and uncaring. I have no clue, as to your ages, or how long you have been together, that may be a factor, but all this one incident shows me is that the communications is lacking.

It also shows you let her do as she pleases whether you like it or not. And that means you lacking in honest communications as well. Well you can expect good result unless you take good actions my friend, so make your side heard, or let her do what she has been doing, without you there to put up with it.

When you allow bad behavior, then that's what you get.