[phazelost]

She always says, 'Why don't you trust me?'. I tell her I do, but my paranoia always kicks in. She's been living with me for well over 3 years, and if I tell her not to talk to someone, she normally doesn't. Now she's left me, and told me she loves me, she just can't live with me. She needs space, and we'll re-evaluate after a few weeks. However, we're still having sex every time we see each other. I know she's not cheating, a guy just knows these things. She doesn't feel different, and I have been cheated on before. Trust me, if she was cheating, I would know it. What should I do? She does hang out with her guy friends. Recently she went to a bar with a guy, but she asked me to meet her afterwards so WE could do OUR OWN thing. I thought this was a good sign, and she didn't hesitate to tell me what happened. There was nothing, and I do trust her. In my heart, I don't think she's looking for anyone else. She almost always takes my calls, but there are times she doesn't. She tells me she's busy, and why do I always have to check up on her. I'm scared if I can't change my paranoid ways, I might have lost her forever.

[Wondergirl]

She doesn't feel different, and I have been cheated on before. Trust me, if she was cheating, I would know it.

Good grief!! I cannot believe you wrote that!!

If you were my boyfriend and as paranoid as you are, I would cut you lose as fast as I could. Do you check her cell phone and email? Do you sniff her clothes for another guy's smell on her? Good grief! Get a grip!

if I tell her not to talk to someone, she normally doesn't

For that directive alone, I'd cut you lose. NO ONE tells me whom I can talk to or not.

[mystific]

I'm really curious to know how old you are?

You don't 'tell' a partner to do anything. Are you crazy? I wouldn't of lasted 3 years.. 3 days.. possibly... max. The girl deserves a medal.

Do your ex girl a favour.. leave her be, unless you change YOUR ways.. I don't see this having a happy ending.

[gogogeo24]

Lots of women prefer the attention they get from men. Simple answer. If you can live with a girl that likes attention, go for it. But, bear in mind, she won't change. Good luck.

[411Help]

Sooner or later, your paranoia will steer her away from you.

[talaniman]

Just because you call it your paranoia doesn't mean it is unless you have been diagnosed by a professional, but you do seem to have a low self esteem problem that maybe came from being cheated on before.

You are right though, your behavior has already run her out of the house, and unless you think before you act, or speak you will continue to drive a wedge between you, and her, until she is gone for good. Unless you get some help with rebuilding that self esteem, you will run everyone you ever get hooked up with away.

I think you tell her why you act the way you do, and promise to do better while you get help to prove you are serious. How long was it from the time you got cheated on to the time you met your girlfriend?