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hohol · Jan 1, 2007, 05:49 PM

Well my girlfriend and I at first been going great, we talked we did things together it was all going great, but after a while we stopped talking and just were physical, and when I tried talking to her asking about her day or saying talk to me it never got anywhere, and she says she wants a break from me. And when we talk its not deep or its barely a conversation, two questions... what do I do and when we talk how should I make it into a real conversation because we can't even talk more then half an hour we just get physical can some one help me with that. What does it mean that she wants a break, see other people or just miss me for a little so the feelings come back for me?

hohol · Jan 1, 2007, 06:20 PM

Well its not like all I want is sex I want things to go back like they were, I want the excitement back and I want to be able to talk to her like I used to, its not even about sex I just don't want to lose her, I am taking her out tomorrow so we can talk about what is going on but I feel like it will be awkward and we won't talk for a while, I just want to have a fun conversation with her like I have with my other friends but I feel like there's nothing to talk about with her, I need some help talking to her and keeping the conversation going an deep

s_cianci · Jan 1, 2007, 06:37 PM

It sounds like you may be being a bit overbearing and pressuring her. Back off for a while and give her the space she says she wants. Don't call or e-mail her. Live your life and do it without her. Being overly clingy or needy (or giving the impression that you are) is the surest way to push someone away from you and it sounds like that's what may be happening here.

hohol · Jan 1, 2007, 06:50 PM

Thanks for the help, but this is another worry of mine, I want to be able to talk to her for hours at a time again, it just seems like we stopped having things to talk about, I will back off her but I just want to talk to her until her cellphone battery dies, can I have some tips on what to talk about or tips how to keep a conversation going

Nohitter410 · Jan 1, 2007, 07:50 PM

Why do you have to put a timeframe on a conversation or an event. Just have fun and let it flow. If she wants to just fool around then do it if you don't feel like being physical then don't. But don't say why are we not this or that. Give her space, you will lose her if you don't. You don't need to force hour conversations, most of the time you shouldn't even notice how long you are talking anyway because it is flowing and time just flies by and you look at your phone and say wow did I actually talk that long.

But in your point, you are overbearing and need to back off. You can tell us 100 times what you want but it isn't what she wants. So give space or lose her. Choice is yours. Sorry to be so blunt.

hohol · Jan 1, 2007, 07:52 PM

Thanks guys for the advice and its fine to be blunt

chuff · Jan 1, 2007, 11:52 PM

Originally Posted by hohol

thanks for the help, but this is another worry of mine, i want to be able to talk to her for hours at a time again, it just seems like we stopped having things to talk about, i will back off her but i just want to talk to her until her cellphone battery dies, can i have some tips on what to talk about or tips how to keep a conversation going

Hohol, you asked and answered your own question right here. You've talked to this woman so much that you've run out of things to talk about. You've given so much of yourself that you have nothing left to give. You've shared every story, you've shared everything about yourself, you have no mystery left. You have no coversation topics left. In the meantime, you've given up a part of your own self to focus on her which created a void in you that she is sees as boring and unsatisfingy. You need to back off and create more of a mystery about yourself.

talaniman · Jan 2, 2007, 06:00 AM

It takes two people to work together, and when one wants a break, give it to them and leave them alone and get a life without them. Move on!

hohol · Jan 2, 2007, 06:37 PM

OK one more question how do I get the feeling of the catch back?

J_9 · Jan 2, 2007, 06:44 PM

Hohol, with this gal, you don't. I hate to burst your bubble, but she said she wanted space. So, give it to her. You're not going to get the "feeling" back with her.

Please don't be needy or clingy, that is what it is sounding like here.

Take it from a woman, we don't want needy, we don't want clingy. Live your life, let her live hers.

chuff · Jan 3, 2007, 01:46 AM

Originally Posted by hohol

ok one more question how do i get the feeling of the catch back?

You've given her everything. She has nothing left to catch. That is why you don't waste hours on the phone. That is why you do things that enhance your life. You've drained your resources. There are no more.

talaniman · Jan 3, 2007, 04:19 AM

Originally Posted by hohol
ok one more question how do i get the feeling of the catch back?

99 Percent of the time, it is better to accept the fact that it over and she/he is moving on to bigger and better things. For your sake the sooner you move on, the happier you'll be, and all you have to do is read what others in this forum have said to know that the best way to heal is leave her alone, and get a life without her. Its like a broken record, and waiting for someone to change their mind and comeback does nothing but hold you back from moving on. Its rough the first time, but time will get your head back on your shoulders so be patient and work on yourself.