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brantheman14 · Dec 8, 2009, 09:47 PM

I've been dating this girl for three months. As soon as we met we clicked, I know everything about her, sometimes too much lol. She went out with this abusive jerk for 6 years! And this other guy was a summer fling that she took really seriously and he just wanted to hook up. He dropped her for a new toy. We really love each other now, and these other guys always get mentioned in our conversations and she still talks to him. Today she kept singing this song that she wrote about him dropping her. Today I walked her somewhere and I found from her friend she went to his apartment to sing this song to him! She clearly still has something for him and I don't how to handle this. Please if you've been through something like this please give me some wise insight.

And remember I want to preserve the relationship if possible... thanks

BlackVY · Dec 8, 2009, 09:53 PM

I don't think it is possible... she seems like she is really into this guy, and for her to go to his place to sing it to him is a huge red flag.

What would be worse is if she had gone to his place to sing it while still dating you.

As always, the best advice is to talk to her about it and let her know how this makes you feel. If she doesn't see anything wrong with it, then my advice is to run... because this girl is going to hurt you...

CanIBuyAClue · Dec 8, 2009, 11:08 PM

I agree, it's time to cut your losses and run. The way I read it she did go sing to him while you guys were together. Humongous red flag. It sounds like she is pretty immature and still only has a thing for him because he dumped her. It's the part of wanting what you can't have. I say it's time to return the favor and tell her to hit the bricks. You'll protect your heart in the end.

amicon · Dec 9, 2009, 01:49 AM

I agree with the previous posters-something's not right here-time to walk away.

talaniman · Dec 9, 2009, 05:16 AM

How old are you two? Why be with a female who still sings, and talks, about her exes?

I would have to let her know that I wasn't interested in her past boyfriends, and find out exactly why she felt the need to go to his place, and serenade him.

I don't think she is as in love as you are, so be careful.