[fren004]

Hi everyone..

I'm 21 years old gay man and still studying.. I met a guy who was my classmate and we start to be friend since then.. during the first year of our friendship, I did not have any feelings for him.. and we even not that close.. he knew I'm gay and he is okay with it
But in the 2nd year now,things totally changed.. we always study and hang out together- become best friends.. we come to each other places to stay overnight sometimes.. he is so nice.. he always there for me and I start to fell in love with him.. but I just keep it to myself and I do not dare to tell him..

I know that he is straight.. he talks about girls he admired with me sometimes and I just hear it as good friend, hiding my real feeling for him..
One night,I stay overnight at his place to do some assgmnt and we sleep in the same bed.. I really don't know what got into my head that night,I start to hug him tight,craziest thing I have ever done-trying to make out with some straight guy.. I kiss him and out of my expectation he kiss me back!this the first time I had sex with him.on the next morning, I going to apologized to him for what happened last night.. and he said " nothing happens''.. so,I let it be as I didn't know what to do and ashamed of myself..
But,this things repeated every time I stay overnight at his place.. but he always try to avoid talking about our sex.. he said he is not gay and he himself don't know why he felt something with me.. about sex,he said I'm the one who seducing him and don't want our friends to know about it..

I said to him maybe he is gay and we can try to make things out together.. but he refuses to admit and to do so.. he still call and text me-like he concern about me... we meet after class as usual.. but this is really killing me inside..
FRIENDS AT ASK MEHELPDESK, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Is he gay or just confused and shame to admit it?shoud I give him some time?I really love him and I don't want this kind of relationship with him.. I have tried to forget my feelings and move on, but I see him everyday and my love seems to be stronger..
I don't want to avoid him as I don't want to tear apart our friendship.. help me

[amicon]

He seems very confused and I think you should give him space and time to figure out who he is. If he is still trying to figure out who he is sexually its not a good time to try and have a relationship. Keep yourself busy and do things you like doing.good luck.

[talaniman]

I don't want to avoid him as I don't want to tear apart our friendship.. help me

This kind of friendship will drive you crazy, so you do need to distance yourself, to deal with your feelings without his influence, and give him space to deal with his own confusion.

To bad you can't communicate on an even level, and resolve this issue between you, but you can't. He doesn't want to, so leave him alone. You will be the one that allows yourself to be used, and confused. Maybe not intentionally, but the results will be the same, somebody gets hurt.