[codelle1]

Ok, so I've dated my ex for two years and throughout that time we had an extremely complicated relationship. We did everything together and even worked at Starbucks together but at different stores (around the corner from each other). However, we fought a lot because he constantly lied about exes and girls... never sex though as far as I know. Bottom line I couldn't trust him and that made us get into a lot of fights. Also I must add that although I was the more dominant one in the relationship, when we got into serious fights he would get physical. Anyway so the last time he put his hands on me, I ended things and all contact. So we haven't spoken in a while and then one day I got incredibly horny and decided to call him over, the sex was ASOLUTELY AMAZING. We just got back into that couple groove as if nothing ever happened, I felt so comfortable and we were talking after the sex and cuddling so comfortably. Now the bad part, he's seeing this new girl and they had sex and everything, basically they are bf/gf. At first I didn't care because I wanted nothing but sex with him, but knowing that another girl in the picture is killing me. Despite her, he says that he would get back with me in a heartbeat as long as I say the word and the girl would be gone. Now these are the questions I need answered:

1. The hitting is such a serious issue, how can we ever get past that?
2. How can we be together again, knowing that he's had sex with his another girl even though she's technically his current girlfriend?
3. How can we date again, with my friends knowing what he's done? I don't want to be that dumb girl.
4. Won't my karma be f'ed up for sleeping with my ex while he has a girlfriend, especially if I get back with him and make him end it with her?
5. Should I just let them be together and move on with my life? (I still care about him obviously and we both know each other so well and have amazing sex)
6. If we do get back together, what steps can we take to mend the damage and have a healthy relationship?:confused:

[N0help4u]

1. He needs to take a really good domestic abuse class
2. how can you be messing with him when he is still with the other girl and then questioning the very thing you are doing?
3. worrying about your friends only complicates things.
4. yeah you are bringing on bad karma cheating never works to your good.
5. YES YES YES
6. You need to start mending it now by leaving him alone and waiting. You are tearing things right now. He won't have respect for you the way things are now. So if you do get back together he will feel he can cheat on you---even with her.

[jjwoodhull]

First, violent behavior tends to escalate, not decrease with time. My best friend put up with it from her boyfriend, married him and was eventually murdered by him. This is a very serious issue.

Second, if he is cheating on his girlfriend with you, then he probably cheated on you with other girls.

Third, good sex is not that hard to find. It does not equal love.

For your own physical and emotional well being cut this guy out of your life immediately. Do not call, email, text, IM, etc. Do not answer him if he contacts you. Don't visit his MySpace, Facebook, Twitter pages. Move on. Find a decent guy who treats you well.

[talaniman]

Stay out of complicated, abusive, relationships, with violent people. Period.

[I wish]

After you told us, there's no reason to get back together.

In relationship, if the person had 1 bad thing for every 99 good things, then you might be able to work around it.

In your case, you've got 99 bad things for every 1 good thing.

Why don't you find some else who actually cares about you? Someone who will treat you with respect.

Start with having some self-respect and realizing that you deserve better than this.

[Romefalls19]

All I read was he was abusive, after that I stopped reading and it's really not complicated. You run for the hills, no turning back. He won't change, doesn't want to change. He's still tapping you and dating another girl, he's got the life. He will do the same to you