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tpsw123 · Jan 16, 2009, 03:27 AM

I have recently split from my husband of 7 yrs! We had problems about 18 months ago & never really come through them although we did try. We have now completely drifted apart.
I have started having contact with an old friend who is also just out of a long term relationship... we get on brilliantly & enjoy each others company. We have known each other all our lives & there has always been a mutual attraction (did go out couple times as teenagers)
We have both agreed that we don't want anything more than fun, to live & enjoy life again..
Although I'm worried that there's too much attraction and it will complicate things.

liz28 · Jan 16, 2009, 05:37 AM

The two of you have to have control over yourself. Attraction can only make things complicated only if the two people involve makes it complicated. Don't do anything you regret and think before you do things.

Question: You stated you and your husband splitting from one another but did you get a divorce? Did you split with your husband after or before this friend came into the picture? Did you and your husband try going to counseling to help your with your problems?

talaniman · Jan 16, 2009, 08:17 AM

I would advise you to settle this marriage before you look for fun, and the possibility of sex.

Any attraction will be a strong one given what you have been through, and you certainly deserve happiness, but not at the expense of taking care of your family business. That means distractions also.

If you stay within the bounds of good behavior, I can agree with a friendship, but doubt you can, or will. Don't let the need for fun and company, and some attention take your eyes off what must be done to straighten out your own life.

Your at a weak point in your judgments and feelings right now. So resist the impulsive.

tpsw123 · Jan 16, 2009, 08:33 AM

HI Liz28... My husband did not want to go to counselling when we 1st experience problems as he felt that they were my issues... the distance between us just got wider as time went on... my friend has always been there as friends through family, but yes due to family events he was around more just before the split finally happened. I can 100% say he is not the reason for the split.

HistorianChick · Jan 16, 2009, 08:43 AM

But, are you divorced? Have the papers gone through?

I wouldn't get involved with anyone, even just "for fun," until the papers are signed and the divorce is final.