[jay_bastida]

To make a short story short... a friend is wanting to settle down for good and she states that I am 'thee' guy.. we have known each other for about 4 years and always always we kept in communication, hang out and we even dated for 5 months (completely diff story, did not break up on bad terms its just that she had wayyy too much things on her plate for her to give a 'relationship' the attention it requires so we mutually agreed it was not the right time for neither of us) we kept talking afterwards and I would date people and she would be aware of it cause we good friends... and she would always want to know.. but OK time passes by and she comes out and tells me that she wants me back, but for a long term commitment; she states that I am the kind of hubby she wants.. ''i knew that when we broke up, that when the time comes to it, whether it be now or later, I wanted to marry you''.. ''and I want to give myself, body and soul to you (she a virgin)'' so wow, that's a significant statement.. now, to how I FEEL/THINK about her, this girl has it all, well at least in my book, but as to marrying her? Hmm.. idk. I'm young.. well WE both young! And well I see her as marriage material but not NOW.. I don't know how to tell her or break it to her, because she wants to be exclusive and well to be honest, not me, there are certain things about her that holds me back in becoming her boyfriend RIGHT NOW. Ever since she told me this which was about a month ago, she has been around, like things seem as if we seeing each other. I think that in her mind, since she told me that, we should be together.. and well I still want to date people.. and I know that WHEN the time comes, I would look for a wife that has the qualities that she has... now, is this selfish of me?? Or what or how should I tell her??

[talaniman]

Is this the same female?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...rt-300957.html

If it is, better go slow, and be honest and you make things worse by having sex, and keep having sex with her.

Bet you didn't tell her of your desires to date others before you deflowered her.

Thats dog action, and you really should have known better. Be honest with this female. Telling her NO would have been the right thing to do as now since you got what you wanted, your ready to go.

[jay_bastida]

umm.. no that other girl was different one.. that was 'a' girlfriend.. girl-friend.. but no this is the same girl I posted up about in August 08.. this one I was acted really selfish before.. but now I think I've learned to appreciate her values and she great; but we haven't been dating or seeing each other for a whille

[talaniman]

But did you explain to her that your not ready to settle down?

[jay_bastida]

Yes. The way I see it is that she KNOWS I'm not ready, and she WANTS me to be with her, but at the same time she Doesn't want me to be with other people... and I don't WANT to looser her, cause MAYBE in the future we will settle down... bottom line, I'm not done *** around, partying, dating, going out.. don't think its my time to let that go yet..

[plonak]

Yea you're young, this girl is pressuring you way too much..

I feel like if you're not ready for a commitment and she is, then you two aren't meant to be together (at least not at this time)

Just move forward and do what you want to do.. don't be afraid to lose her, like I said if you both were ready to get married then she'd be the girl for you, but you're not ready.. kind of getting the picture?

Oh and there are plenty of girls out there that have good morals and our marriage potential, you don't have to settle just because you think she's the only one like that.. this is a big world we live in, remember that

[jay_bastida]

thank you.. your right..
just needed an outside perspective I gues.. =]