[Spranza]

What makes you so sure he is telling the truth? He may be as good at is as you are.

PEOPLE... you are missing the real lair here... ITS ME...


I know him... I talked to his sisters... his friends... he is not lying... if I have doubts that he is lying... then I won't waste my time everyday thinking of him... and crying...


Any way... thanks K_3... I wish if he is a liar... that will be a relief

[Spranza]

*blinks* I want 10 minutes of my life back.

I AM SO SORRY BREAK!! I KNOW I DON'T DESERVE THE AIR I BREATH!!


But I have a believe...

I have a believe that I was sent to him by God... I am there in his email for a purpose... and its HOLLY... no one knows it but God!.

But I believe its for the good of both of us !

[starbuck8]

I know I am that cruel .... but I swear it wasn't meant to be like that ... and I feel so bad for him and I .......

Telling him could be the right thing to do .... but words are not like actions .....

the thought of telling him the truth kills me when it just crosses my mind .... how about putting this in action .... I can't tell him I lied to you .... he might have a heart attack

he might live with a scar the rest of his life ...... he appreciate friendship to madness ... a friend to him is like God!!! .....

I deformed even his principles and figures of his life ..... I'll be a curse on him ... IF he knew I am a lair ...

Besides ..... I won't be ready to absorb his possibly negative reaction or listen to his bad words.... not after he becomes EVERYTHING in my life !!

He once said something to me .... it was not that bad .... and he never meant what I understood .....but I just almost died .... and he was talking to himself for a while .. because I was crying .... it did hurt me like hell... and I was thinking of what he said for a week or something .... shedding tears whenever I remember it ....

How about taking all his anger .... I WON"T BEAR IT .....

I know its my mistake and I should pay for it .... but now he is my BEST friend .... and I can only see him that kind nice boy I usually talk to and open my heart for him ....

if he just yells at me .... I would die ...

I don't think you are so worried about him here! You sound more concerned with yourself, and how YOU would feel. This is a virtual internet friendship! :rolleyes:

Read all of your "I's"
-- 'I' can't tell him 'I' lied (he may have a heart attack?)
-- 'I' deformed his principles
-- 'I'll' be a curse on him
-- 'I' am a liar
-- 'I' just almost died
-- 'I' was crying --hurt ME like hell
-- 'I won't bear it
-- 'I' should pay for it
-- 'I' would die
-- 'I won't be able to absorb
-- 'I' usually talk to

Now read the things you said about "him"
-- 'He' might live with a scar for the rest of his life
-- 'He' might have a heart attack
-- 'Friendship to him is like God??
-- 'EVERYTHING' in my life
-- 'MY' best friend (if he yells at ME, I would die)

Do you REALLY think that he thinks the world revolves around you? He would have a heart attack if he found out? Comparing your friendship to that of God?

Those are all pretty arrogant statements. Do you really think you have that much power over someone you've met on the internet? I really doubt that HIS world revolves around YOU.

I think you need to spend more time off your computer, and talking to "real" people that you can see and touch... not on a webcam!

Go out and meet yourself some real flesh and blood people, and stop being so loyal to the virtual guy!

You're living in the virtual dream world!

[Spranza]

Do you REALLY think that he thinks the world revolves around you? He would have a heart attack if he found out? Comparing your friendship to that of God??

Those are all pretty arrogant statements. Do you really think you have that much power over someone you've met on the internet? I really doubt that HIS world revolves around YOU.

Yeah.. you are right... I concern about myself more... well... it was I who lied at the first place... it was I who made up the whole stupid #$%^ story!.

and at the end... it should be "I" who must regret it...

and I don't think that his world revolves around me... but I talked to that guy... and I know how much I mean to him... he got over than 100 contacts on his email... I SAW IT BY MY OWN EYES!. and he goes online just to talk to me...

and he keeps telling me that I am his BEST friend and the only one who can understand him better... he told me about his friends and how they betrayed him... and how he felt about it... it was awful

You're living in the virtual dream world!

This virtual world has more meaning than the real one... for me
and lots of people get to know each other by this virtual world... and some even got married!! I heard lots and lots of stories...

and mine became a tragic one among them...

even if its virtual... as long as it can affect your life and your feelings then its as real as the real world!

I shouldn't lie to someone!. Its feelings... they are real!

I JUST FEEL SO BAD!.

P.S
We didn't chat by cam... nor by phone... ONLY MSN...

[talaniman]

You are way to emotionally, and physically, invested into this fantasy world, to make any realistic decisions. For your sake turn off the computer, and seek a real person, preferably a professional to talk to, and get back to the real world of real people. Please, I beg you.

[starbuck8]

I believe you that you feel bad. But bad enough to tell him the truth? If you want to keep on lying to him, that is your own choice! Is it going to make you feel better? Probably not. Are you missing out on a 'normal' relationship? Probably so. Will your virtual friendship last long? Probably not. Are you living a fantasy? Probably so.

Give the magic 8 ball a shake and see what it has to say.

[ampersandra]

Tell him the truth. This is YOUR responsibility. You want to fix things and the way to do it is to tell the truth. What else can you really do? If you can offer an alternative, tell me.

However, just because you are telling the truth does not mean he will forgive you. YOUR responsibility is YOURS. The result is HIS choice, whether you like it or not. You'll have to accept it. At least you will know that you actually DID something right, finally.

[K_3]

You are way to emotionally, and physically, invested into this fantasy world, to make any realistic decisions. For your sake turn off the computer, and seek a real person, preferably a professional to talk to, and get back to the real world of real people. Please, I beg you.

Very well put talaniman

[K_3]

When you say you "talk" to these friends and relatives of this guy, is it "talking" with your voice or is it emailing?
Yes, there are friends who marry someone they met on the net, some success stories. There are many many stories of scams, lies, deceit. I am not saying this is true with him. If you were to ask him he would probably say you were honest.
I agree that you are far too involved with a fantasy world. Talking on the net, meeting people on line is not a bad thing, as long as you keep it in perspective. Until you see someone face to face, spend some time with that person, observe their actions and reactions, you do not know that person. In an online relationship you only know what that person wants you to know. I knew a guy that pretended to be a woman.

Your emotions are way out there on this. You need to tell him the truth and let this be a lesson to you. Lies will always come back and bite you in the end. He may be upset, but who knows he may understand. He may have several emails, several "best friends" that he has given his password to in order to prove his honesty. If not, life is about forgiving, his reaction will tell you something about him.

You really need to get a grip on real life. Please go find a friend or family member and give them a hug, you need a real life reality check.

[Spranza]

Ok guys...

So.. I assume it's the last and the only sulotion

...... THE TRUTH.....

Even if that means I will lose him forever...

Truth means end of this wonderful freindship... it means Goodbye forever...

Its so hard to lose a friend like him... he is sooo REAR! And unique...

if you were in my shoes you will know how hard it will be to say the words "I lied to you!"

I just wanted to be next to him... and give him any kind of help he needs... I would do anything he wants... He is my BEST friend EVER!!

But doing this will be hard for both of us...
He will be shoked and hurt... and I will be left alone !

But it's the right thing to do... Since I can't bear it any more... he is a great person! And I can't do this to him... I cry whenever he crosses my mind... because I feel sorry.. and I can't say I am so sorry...


BUT I CAN'T DO IT... its just... omg

Ok... let me at least make it up to him... I want to do something good to him... so when he know about it he will say.. I didn't waste my time... at least I got that thing out of the whole crap!

But I don't know how to make it up to him..!

[K_3]

How to make it up to him... hmmmm. Be honest with him today and forever more. Be honest with yourself, you want to believe this is all about him going to miss you. I believe it is more about you missing him. That is the truth. He may feel hurt at first, but what will he really be missing, a big lie.
You are not only living in a fantasy world on the net, you are also living in your mind. You are guessing he is going to say or do this or that, it is all thoughts in your mind. The more you dwell on it and think, the more creative and dramatic you get. It is not REAL. You have no idea how he is going to react, even when he tells you how he feels, if you do not see him, will you really know how he reacted or felt?

[Spranza]

When you say you "talk" to these friends and relatives of this guy, is it "talking" with your voice or is it emailing?

You really need to get a grip on real life. Please go find a friend or family member and give them a hug, you need a real life reality check.

I only chatted with them... MSN... not on phone...

And I want to clear something out... I care about that friend... I love him as a close friend ... its not like what you think... its pure friendship...


What's with the real world idea... I see internet world is as real as the real world... its just so hard to separate them since most of my friends are online contacts!

[K_3]

I did not think anything other than him being a friend. I am sorry if I implied differently.
I am just worried about you. It is OK to have online friends. It is not healthy to have more online friends than friends you see and visit and touch each day. It is too easy to loose contact with reality. I am just concerned about you, that is all.

[Spranza]

How to make it up to him........hmmmm. Be honest with him today and forever more. Be honest with yourself, you want to believe this is all about him going to miss you. I believe it is more about you missing him. That is the truth. He may feel hurt at first, but what will he really be missing, a big lie.

Its not a big lie!. My feelings are all real... everything I said about my personality is real... I lied only about the events around me... my environment..!

What you said is sooo right...
Its more about me going to miss him!. yeah.. I believe this is so true...

I am so deep in this now... what should I do?

How about disappearing... I don't want to hurt him!.
But I will go through this gradually...
I won't go online everyday... I'll make it once a week... and so on... till I completely gone

[BMI]

Wow, what an unusual way of writing.

From what I understand, you lied to a guy on the internet about how you look, how then did you meet his sisters??

This story is really unusual and does not make a heck of a lot of sense to me. Provided this story is factual then view it from this angle, IF he lovesyou or confides in you and has come to develop some deep mystical bond between you (fantasy) what should it matter what you look like? Isn't the inner you more important to this wonderful human being you've described. Someone so great cannot possibly be superficial to shun you because you are a little lacking in self-confidence can he?

Also, what's with all the deserving to die talk? Geez, I've done worse things on a bus than this. I'm not making light of it but you are going way overboard with how serious this transgression really is.

I'm still not convinced this story is actually true, I'll wait for your answer about the sisters.

[Spranza]

K_3... you are really nice...

Thanks for your concerns and your help... they mean a lot to me...

I am just confused!. and I need to talk it all out...

Thax for listening to me as well

[BMI]

Oh, I didn't even draw attention to the fact he is an internet buddy which you have never met!! Tell him the truth or delete him if you cannot handle telling him. Also, get off these social network sites for your own sanity, you don't seem like a person that is well suited for these things. If your so drawn to the computer in your spare time than you'd be wise to start playing internet hearts (I'm goooooood) or reversi (I can't be beat on a consistent basis), it'd be a lot more healthy for you.

[Spranza]

BMI...

What is so weird about my writing... I didn't thought it's that unclear... please tell me if there is anything wrong with it... so I can improve it...

Well,
This story is soooo real... and if you didn't believe it, it will be my pleasure to send you all the chat logs for both of us.. I keep them...

I've post the whole thing... I lied to someone.. I gave him a different identity... not the real me... to take revenge of something he did to my niece...

So when I knew that guy better... I started to change my mind about him being selfish and cruel... but it was too late for me to say I was fake... because we became close friends... and I couldn't tell him I lied...

About his sisters...
He liked me as a good friend... and was so proud of me... and he tells his sisters about me... so one day.. he just got me in online group conversation... with his two sisters... I was shocked!. because I knew that he is now trusted me far more than I thought!

And now his sisters are chatting with me... and becoming good friends to me as well... and that what makes it worse than it was already...

Instead of lying to one person... now I am lying to the whole family!

I hope you got it... sorry for my English !

[BMI]

Oh dear you need not apologize for your writing. I said it was unusual in that the way you break up sentences is something I have not seen before.

As for saying I may not be true, I said that because your story reads that you have never met him yet you met his sisters, now that you have clarified it makes more sense.

All the rest I stand behind. This is not healthy for you at all, it is an obsession over a person in whom you have never even met. You would do well to distance yourself from the online world, its like thunderdome, no rules, everything is different and nobody is their REAL self.

Wonderful article about Facebook personalities I happened upon weeks ago. Although the appearance of the individual and information is correct, the rest is what one WANTS to project. No space for writing your faults and real persona, only space for what you do well or want people to think you do well.

Get away from this situation please.

[talaniman]

instead of lying to one person... now I am lying to the whole family!

Either come clean, and be honest, or leave these folks alone. It helps nothing to lie, and then continue to lie does it? Your only confused because you know your actions have consequence. Consequences your unwilling to pay, so either do the right thing, and pay the consequences, or stop giving everyone the impression you're a caring person. Or are you trolling us for attention? This is not a hard problem to solve.