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confused 23 · Mar 23, 2008, 09:48 PM

I have been going out with my Gf for 3 yrs. The relationship was going down hill due to us arguing all the time about stupid things. About a month ago she told me she wants a brake. She told me she wants to do her own thing and concertrate on school. She really wantes to move when she's grads. From college. While we were talking about the brake she said she for the past 3 yrs of us being together she pic us being married... but she didn't have the heart or strength to work on the relationship right now... when I left her house she said we can still be friends... 2 weeks after that she contacts me to tell me that her sister in law had the baby she sent pics of the baby too... we talked a little about us . I asked her if she was happy with the brake she said yes and no... the conversation ended with her saying I'm not ready to get back together yet.. the brake been going on for almost a month and heard from her once which was through a text... so I'm wondering if I should move on or if there is any hope of her coming around

ihatewestseneca · Mar 23, 2008, 10:47 PM

Move on buddy. As hard as it is stick with NC and try to forget about her... if she wants you back she'll tell you... but by then if you have really tried hard to get back to the strong independent man you once were, you'll find that you may not even want her anymore.

You'll never know what can happen in the future, but if you prepare yourself, love yourself, and help yourself become a better person... you'll be able to handle anything.

Stick with NC, it works very very very very well!

jolienoire · Mar 24, 2008, 06:36 AM

Originally Posted by confused 23

the convo ended with her saying im not ready to get back together yet..

There is your answer, so with that being said move on. Moving on doesn't mean jumping into a new relationship it means accepting your partners decision to be happy whether it be with or without you and please no contact until you have healed from this breakup.. don't contact her because it can only push her further away.

Originally Posted by confused 23

so im wondering if i should move on or if there is any hope of her coming around

She may come around but there is really no time limit as to when someone can come back to us, it can be days, months, weeks years, or possibly never... It's going to be tough but you both need time to grow as individuals in the meantime, Do things that you didn't do while you were in a relationship. Enjoy your life! You only have one live it to the fullest.

kochi · Mar 24, 2008, 11:46 AM

Sorry I disagree...

LOL. That sounds just like what happened to me. K so I did the No contact deal, but still thought about her immensly. And it was those words. I still love you and I'm not ready... yet. It is like there is always that hook. Im not ready... yet.

Your going to go nuts thinking what you should or should not do. I did.

Make a decision on what you think you should do. Do what YOU think is right, there is no right or wrong here except what's right for you.

If you feel like waiting. Wait.
If you feel like getting clarification, get it.
IF you feel you need her to commit to one thing of the other, get her to say it.

There is no "I will do this, then this will happen." I will wait cause she will come back. Balh blah blah. SHe might and she might not.

And there is nothing you can do that will chase her away or bring her back, that's how I look at it.

You need to be true to yourself and live with those decisions. That's the hard part.

talaniman · Mar 24, 2008, 11:56 AM

Waiting around for someone to want you, is a waste of time. Love yourself, and be happy with who you are, and live the way you want to, and enjoy your life without her in it. She may want you again, and she may not. For sure she wants a break, so give it to her, and live for you.