[Chery]

it sucks when youve invested time and mental energy.

sometimes you pick a dud.

at this point, what does he have to lose? youve been willing to engage in a relationship that benefits him when he desires it.

ok.

ive done some really, really dumb things. if im an expert at anything in my life, its cause ive had my head so far up me arse that i couldnt tell night from day... and eventually figured out what was right and healthy. only took several years and loads of emotional baggage... other than that, it was nothing.

so... time to stop and relax. let yourself be in a failed relationship that needs to pass. dont kick yourself too much, and dont let yourself off completely. and forget about him... until he is kicking your door down, needing you in his life, its all just talk. even then, its still probably just talk.

so time to let it go, take the hard lessons to heart, and delete everything about him.

you need to be alone, without his noise, before you can be in a good, healthy place. its worth the pain and the insecurity.

been there, done that.

i promise, its worth it.

kp.. had to spread the rating... but this rates one BIG 'Super'
She needs to get away from feeling that her only job is to please men, feel inferior, and loose the brainwashing she has had probably since childhood.

Jeff.. good to see you again, and you're doing a good job here too, dear.

Careaboutyou... I have met many young women like you who think that you need to look pretty and please a man in order to 'feel' right. You also need to better your english by reading more, or watching decent TV shows that help you better your vocabulary if you think the only reason men use you for is your 'booty'. Get some self-respect and work on learning what you want for your future, not what you should be for someone else so that 'they' will be happy with you. YOU need to be happy with YOURSELF! This will take some time, but believe me it will be worth it.

Please don't think I'm being mean here.. it is just that I am sick and tired of seeing young women like you tolerating what others have molded you into and made you think that your only value is your body.

Get out of chatrooms and go out and meet people so that you can look them in the eyes and see what they are really like and if they accept you in public, take you out, and respect you.. then those are the kind of people you need to make friends with... And I mean friends.. no body contact until you feel warm, respected, and cared about as a person and not as a body for pleasure. It will be hard, but you need to take that first step toward independence and security as a person.

Stay away from men who give you the feeling that it is your only duty to please them - they are ignorant and only want to control. They will never be capable of real love.

Good luck dear, and keep us posted.

Do you like what you see 10 years down the road? If not.. change it now! Nobody will take you by the hand and make it better... it's up to you to take that first step.

[careaboutyou]

I live in good life at this stage... but only can't find someone I have feeling for and who want to be with me and care about me...

I am doing well in here and I have a decent job as well... I need friendships from you guys.. thanks... I will keep working hard on my English...

[pinkrose7]

He hiding something I think he has someone looking on his msn looking to see who he talking to ang he doesn't want take person to see your name

[Chery]

I live in good life at this stage...but only can't find someone I have feeling for and who want to be with me and care about me...

I am doing well in here and I have a decent job as well....I need friendships from you guys..thanks...I will keep working hard on my English....

That's good to know dear. How about the rest of you? Don't be afraid to go out and make new friends - and it is OK to say no if they want more than what you are willing to give.

It has been two months, so how about giving us an update?

Hope all is well.

[careaboutyou]

Thank you guys, I love you for all your kindly unconditional support...

I am still working hard on my language skills...

All the best to all you guys here...

[Chery]

Good for you dear.

If you get stuck or just want to talk, you know where to find us.