[mora1234]

Can it be forgaven?

Has any one every been forgiven and done it again?

Has any one every done it and never did it again?

I just am looking for peoples thoughts on this subject:o

[imation]

That's such a hard question, someone I know cheated on their boyfriend and he forgave her and she never did it again, I remember the remorse she felt, it was quite depressing to be around her but she was my best friend so I consoled her even though I didn't like what she did. I think every situation is different, different couples might get back together and work, some might not

[snuffy]

Put it this way: here's my situtuation.

My ex cheated on me in July while I was in hospital having had a serious sports accident.

I forgave her a little to readily. But it ate me up inside; maybe more so because she didn't appear to show any remorse.

My relationship became worse from that point on, in that I had given her an inch and she took a mile. I allowed her to walk all over me, and for whatever unknown reason I tolerated the abuse. Maybe because I wanted to see the best in her.

Long story short, she continued to act in a very dodgy way which included exes being around her house at the early hours of a morning.

She liked to go down clubbing with friends all the time without me, and not getting home until 6am.

Then after a few months of her giving me emotional torture she ended the relationship (this after I started to stand up to her behaviour)

Then 10 days later sh etells me she's pregnant and tells me it mustv ebeen from such and such date when we last slept together.

But she insists he has no interest whatsoever in even trying to reconcile with me. She's keeping the baby.

Fair enough; I accept this. We'll be separated parents even before baby is born.

Then I attempt to remain friends and keep the whole thing civil, but she continues the bitcy horrible behaviour which was a hallmark of her time with me in our relationship. I get nast sneering comments made to me.

Clearly she doesn't want to be a friend.

Then there's the naming issue. Baby is having her surname she insists. I don't like the idea but fair enough. We agree to compromise and she says if it is a boy I can have my surname as its middle name.

Then weeks later I get her acting erratically in a bar near me, trying to make me jealous, which I did not react to.

Then after other people take offence to her obviously despicable behaviour I decide I do not want this sh*t so I leave. At the point of leaving I am told 'You isn't seeign this baby after it is born.' I still walked off and ignored itl she was drunk, but she's not getting a reaction.

Meanwhile, she is being sick outside because of the high volume of alcohol drunk. She tells people she doesn't want the fu k ng baby anyway.

Next I decide to ignore her further and avoid her completely until the that eth ebaby is due, to save me hassle and abuse from this abusive, disturbed, confused girl. She rings me constantly. @where are u, where did you get to' She texts me, I don't reply.

Then I get told the baby is not having my name at all.

I say, but we agreed. She says tough, I don't like your name. I say well we are both the parents so its what we both want that counts. And I say I will defend my rights fully. I will seek legal advice if I have to.

Then I get further torrid abuse. For what? For standing my ground.

Then I get told I am not coming to th enext scan and I'm not coming to the birth and I'm going to get all manner of 'trouble' from her now. I get told that I 'have made things much more awkward for myself now.'

How. Why? Because I stood my ground on th ename.

Is this baby mine. I'm not 100.%

Can you explain her behaviur? I cant, and no one I know can explain it either . Its baffling.

Unless all along the issue is simply THE BABY POSSIBLY Isn't MINE.! Any other reason for such unjustifiably cruel and abusive behaviour to me.


My answer to the OP's question.

People say once a cheat always a cheat. I decided that people deserve a second chance.

But th saying is true. My situation may be highly unusual and far beying most cases.

But in my case it led to the above mess.

YOurs, Disgruntled and disillusioned.

Snuffy.

[Greg Quinn]

Honestly, it all depends on your situation, who you are and it depends on your ability to trust again. For me it was too difficult and I had to move on to better things. I do remember at first I was fine with it and ready to work on it, and even went to counselling. But in time I realized that she had lied a lot about the events, times Etc... So many people are different, and based on your info I'm not sure what to say. Sorry to hear that happened to you, I know one thing... You will always be a little more cautious and aware of his business. Best regards

[TrueFaith]

I can't forgive that.

If you want to leave go for it but tell me first. You should at least owe me this.

I don't cheat no matter how drunk or hot the other person is.

There is no reason for it

[TmichelleO]

I believe it depends on the situation that your in... if you feel the person deserves a second chance then that is you decision... but remember if a person cheats once and you forgive them most of the time they are more inclined to do it again... but that is my opinion based on personal experience