[nixsa]

I am not really sure where to begin... but, I know that I need some advice. My boyfriend of a little over a year broke up with me. He said that he wasn't getting enough space in our relationship. I am so upset over this and feel so let down. I mean we had such a great relationship. He told me that he has never loved anyone the way that he loves me. For our year anniversary I surprised him with a PS3. We were only together 5 months when he quit his job because he wasn't getting along with his manager. I helped him out for 3 months when he didn't have a job. I really love him. And I have tried to talk things through with him but, we always end up in an argument. I found out that when I was sleeping he went through my cell phone and found text messages that I sent to friends and my sister when I was upset with him True, I did say some pretty harsh things in the texts. But, it was only because I was mad at the time. I never expected for him to look in my phone to find them. On his birthday back in may we went to this bar and when I went up to the bar to get my drink there was this guy sitting there making small talk with me. I am a friendly person and I chatted back innocently. I love my boyfriend I don't cheat I have never cheated, I am just a friendly person. He got VERY upset with me over this and he always would bring this up and throw it in my face every time we got into a disagreement. This happened back in May. Regardless, of that happening, we did have a fun relationship and I miss him terribly. I have tried talking to him to work things through. First he tells me he wants to take things one day at a time. Then he tells me that he needs time. Now he's telling me that he doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. I know that he is hurt right now but the messages on my phone and not getting space. But, I know that we belong together. We are both good people. I need some advice on how to resolve this issue with him. I want to work this out and I am just not sure. Normally when I break-up with someone I can just let it go and move on. But, I can't with him. Please help me.

[Wondergirl]

Walk away. Don't look back. This guy is NOT "good people". He is a control freak. Anyone who secretly reads old text messages and goes ballistic over your talking to some guy in a bar doesn't deserve you. He doesn't trust you now. What will it be like in three months... or in a year... or if you marry? I get cold chills just thinking about it. You may love him. He doesn't love you. He's proved that. He's even said that. Walk away. Don't look back.

[ashleynbrett88]

Walk away. Don't look back. This guy is NOT "good people". He is a control freak. Anyone who secretly reads old text messages and goes ballistic over your talking to some guy in a bar doesn't deserve you. He doesn't trust you now. What will it be like in three months...or in a year...or if you marry? I get cold chills just thinking about it. You may love him. He doesn't love you. He's proved that. He's even said that. Walk away. Don't look back.

I think she is completey wrong.. love is about bumps in the road and its not perfect... give him his space and when he realizes that he can't live with out you he will come back.
But don't give up unless you truly know it's going nowhere anymore.

[Wondergirl]

I think she is completey wrong.. love is about bumps in the road and its not perfect ... give him his space and when he realizes that he can't live with out you he will come back.
but don;t give up unless you truly know it's going nowhere anymore.

Wishing and hoping won't make him a less controlling person. Giving him "chances" won't smooth out bumps in the road because he will always be making sure there are bumps in the road. He has shown his true colors. Of course, if he goes with her to counseling and makes a real effort to stop overseeing and controlling her life, then there might be a chance. I betcha he won't be interested in any kind of counseling though.