[Meg123]

For 3 years I liked this boy before we finally started dating. The year before we started dating, we wrote each other long letters (about 15 pages) and talked every night. He was going through some pretty hard times and I was the only person he talked to about it. FINALLY after three years we started dating and it was just incredible. I knew that we both cared about each other so much. I helped him get through some really difficult stuff and in return he was always there for me when I needed him. We spent all of our time together and when we weren't together we talked for hours on the phone. I became really close to his family and friends and he to mine. He always told me that I was the best thing that had ever happened to him and that he loved me so much. We would always do silly things like go to the park or our favorite coffee shop. He would do the nicest things for me like write me love letters or once he bought me a guitar because he wanted to teach me how to play it. This year we ended up going to college and we both went to the same city for school but I think we were both starting to get a little nervous about how serious our relationship was. The tension was starting to build and it was just obvious that things weren't the same. After almost two years, he broke up with me one night on the phone. He said we would be friends but he was really unemotional about the whole thing which isn't like him. We met up once after that about a week later and he kissed me goodbye but said he didn't think that he loved me anymore. Then about a week later I found out that he was dating another girl. His friends told me that this wasn't why we broke up and that he met her after but I don't understand how he could get over everything so quickly. Now we hardly talk and if we do its dry and casual... like he hardly knows me. I don't know what to do. I miss him so much. He was the first boy I was ever intimate with and he's been my best friend for about 4 years. Not to mention now I'm alone in a city where I know no one hundreds of miles away and he is with someone new. How could he do this?

[NallaNeedsYou]

If it didn't work out it didn't work our for a reason. Move on have fun and keep your innermost heart for when you are really ready to give it away. Guys do stupid things, he might regret it but he had his chance and now you can show him what he missed. Go out and enjoy college study hard and keep busy. If you do things that you like then you will meet people who are similar. Find some new hobbies and don't look back on the times you had together because ultimately they turned to dust. Enjoy the security of your friends and don't rely wholly on a guy. He won't be able to cope and if he brakes then you fall harder than if you where still on your own two feet. Pick yourself up and have a good time, learn from your mistakes and keep striving to be a more interesting person. I hope this helps.

[kctiger]

Everything happens for a reason. You being on this website, especially. First and foremost realize you are not alone in this pain. I am going through a bad break up as well. The advice I have to offer is going to be hard, but in the end it is WHAT WORKS!

Right now you are the only person that matters, and I mean that. Do not think about him, call him or even care about him. He does not need you and you do not need him. Repeat the last line a few times. It is time to work on you. Do things that take your mind off this pain. At first, you need a few days or maybe even weeks to grieve. After that, enough is enough. Get off your butt and start working on you. Improve every aspect of yourself you can. You feel alone in a new city right now, and that's rough. But, look at it this way. You are in a perfect position to rebuild your life from the bottom up. You are a great INDIVIDUAL and can do anything you set your mind to. Believe that and start loving yourself, and everything about yourself.

Lastly, your heart is not broken. You only think it is. I know it is a figure of speech, but you would be dead if your heart was broken. You are merely in a lot of pain, such that you have never dealt with before. Realize you are still alive and this life has so many more incredible things to offer you. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and become better than ever. Your life is what YOU make of it, and no one else can touch that. No one can hurt you more unless you let them. So don't! We are all here for you. This website works wonders for people like you and me who need to vent. So vent, and we will not judge you, only offer our helping words cause believe me, we do care about you. Good luck!